ID: 10860
Redneck
You know your a redneck if...
You tell your kids the facts of life and they interrupt you with corrections.
You've ever given your date flowers from a cemetery.
You proposed at Denny's.
The biggest compliment you got at your wedding was how cute your baby was.
You had a marriage license before you had a drivers license.
You've ever reused wedding invitations.
The last thing your ex-wife ever said to you was "It's me or them dogs."
If your wedding invitations ever said "same time same place."
At your wedding reception you put Alka-Seltzer in cheap wine to get "Champagne."
ID: 15059
Redneck
Why do the Arkansas cheerleaders wear bibs?
To keep the tobacco juice off their uniforms.
ID: 12838
Redneck
You know you're from Oklahoma if:
a tornado warning siren is your signal to go out in the yard and look for a funnel.
your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway.
you ever had to switch from heat to A/C in the same day.
you see people wear bib overalls at funerals.
little smokies are something you serve only for "special occasions".
you refer to the capital of Oklahoma as "The City".
you know cowpies are not made from beef.
someone you know has used a football schedule to plan their wedding date.
you have know someone who has had one belt buckle bigger than your fist.
you aren't surprised to find movie rental, ammunition, and bait all in the same store.
your "place at the lake" has wheels under it.
you learned to shoot a 12 guage shot gun before you learned to multiply.
And finally, you are 100% Oklahoman if you have ever heard or been a part of this conversation:
"Ya wanna coke?"
"Yeah."
"What kind?"
ID: 10847
Redneck
Your parrot can say, "Open up, it's the police!"
ID: 14327
Redneck
You might be a redneck if you eat cotton candy more than three times a week.
ID: 2677
Redneck
A young West Virginian girl wanted to go to college at UVA. But her father said "No way! You're going to By-God West Virginia Univ."
Well, she got her way and she went to UVA. The first semester went by, and she wrote home that she was getting married, to a man from Richmond, VA named Clarence. Her father said "I'll be damned if my daughter is marrying a man from Richmond, you're marrying a By-God West Virginian boy," so he sent his two sons to UVA to get their sister.
In a couple of days they returned. The confused father asked "Where is your sister?"
They replied "We were almost there Dad, but we got to this overpass with a sign that said 'Clarence 13'6'' so we turned around and drove the hell out of there!"
ID: 9299
Redneck
If you haven't read this joke
ID: 10348
Redneck
You might be a redneck if your toenail clippers say craftsman on the side!
ID: 10848
Redneck
You used a cheat sheet during your hunter's safety test.
+10,000 Jokes