ID: 10596
Redneck
You Might be a Redneck If you take your family to K-Mart to see a movie.
ID: 12610
Redneck
Rainch - A big cow farm.
Rat - Do it rat now!
Rench - Rench the soap yourself.
Roont - She plum roont her shoes.
Salary - A stringy vegetable.
Soardeens - Small canned fish.
Shar - A light rain.
Gully Worsher - A medium heavy rain.
Toad strangler - A heavy rain Sody.
Pop - A soft drink.
Sprang - Water out'n the ground.
Shurf - The Shurf put Clem in jail.
Storch - This here aprn has too much storch in it.
Skeered - that plumb skeered me to death.
Thanks - He shore thanks he's smart.
Tho - Tho me the ball.
Thoat - I shore got a sore thoat.
War - A bobbed war fance.
Worsh - Go worsh your face.
Warter - What you worsh your face in.
Yurp - A continent overseas.
ID: 12773
Redneck
Question:
What is a Kentucky Virgin?
Answer:
A really ugly seven year old girl who can run faster than her older brother.
ID: 10556
Redneck
How do you confuse a redneck
Ask him a question that is not about NASCAR.
ID: 10847
Redneck
Your parrot can say, "Open up, it's the police!"
ID: 29
Redneck
You know you're a redneck if you introduce a friend to your wife and sister and he only has to shake one hand.
ID: 10754
Redneck
You fart and you are proud of the smell
ID: 8314
Redneck
You are a redneck if:
you've ever had to towel dry after a fart.
ID: 7975
Redneck
The Pentagon announced today the formation of a new 500 man elite fighting unit called the US Redneck Special Forces (USRSF). These North Carolina, South Carolina, Kentucky, West Virginia, Mississippi, Arkansas, Alabama, Georgia, Texas and Tennessee boys will be dropped into Iraq and have been given the following facts about Terrorists:
1. The season opened today
2. There is no limit
3. They taste just like chicken
4. They don't like beer, pickups, Harley Davidson's, country music or Jesus
5. They are DIRECTLY RESPONSIBLE for the death of Dale Earnhardt
This mess in Iraq should be over IN A WEEK