REDNECK

ID: 15794

Redneck

Send in the Clowns

You might be a redneck if...

You're 42 and still have clowns come to your birthday party.

ID: 10841

Redneck

You Might be a Redneck If...

You might be a redneck if you've ever bought a birthday present out of a vending machine.

ID: 11333

Redneck

U Might be

If you work without a shirt on, and so does your husband, you might be a redneck.

ID: 12608

Redneck

How to Talk Native Southern II

Far - What get the brandin arn hot.
Furred - He got furred from his job.
Flar - A rose is a purdy flar.
Frash - Them aigs ain't frash.
Furiners - All non-'bamans.
Further - Hits ten miles further to town.
Grain - She was grain with envy.
Hail - Where bad folks go.
Hep - Poor George, he can't hep it, he was born with a silver spoon in his mouth.
Hern - It aint hern, it's his'n.
Hilbilly - People in the next county.
Hollar – What's between the hills.
Hard - Got a brend new hard.
Tar - His core blew a tar.
Laymun - A sour fruit.
Laig - Most folks have two of them.
Lather - What you climb up.
Liberry - Where you go to check out books for larnin.
Mailk - what you get from cyows.
Mere - What you see yourself in.

ID: 13843

Redneck

You Might be a Redneck

You might be a redneck if at your wedding your tux has a sign on the back that says "sponsored by Bubba's Chicken and Waffles!"

ID: 13992

Redneck

Wedding Ceremony

A couple are getting married in a big fancy church with all of the relatives and friends in attendance.
The priest is going through the nomal procedure and when he comes to the part "If anyone objects to the union of these two people in Holy Matrimony let them speak now or for ever hold their peace".
A redneck in the back row jumps up and hollers "I object, I am in love with her and she's carrying my baby!"
As the gathering gasps in surprise the redneck runs up the aisle, shoves the groom aside and rips off the brides veil.
After a moment of silence the redneck exclaims, "Hey you ain't my sister!"

ID: 10926

Redneck

You Might be a Redneck If...2

You might be a redneck if for your prom you wore a strapless dress but wore a bra that wasn't.

ID: 5069

Redneck

Family Reunion

You know you're a redneck when you go to a family reunion to find a girlfriend.

ID: 10283

Redneck

Hypothetical Question

Two good ole boys down in Alabama were sitting around talking one afternoon over a cold beer...After a while the 1st guy says to the 2nd, "If'n I was to sneak over to your trailer Saturday & make love to your wife while you was off huntin', and she got pregnant and had a baby, would that make us kin?"
The 2nd guy crooked his head sideways for a minute, scratched his head, and squinted his eyes thinking real hard about the question. Finally, he says, "Well, I don't know about kin, but it sure would make us even."

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