ID: 10860
Redneck
You know your a redneck if...
You tell your kids the facts of life and they interrupt you with corrections.
You've ever given your date flowers from a cemetery.
You proposed at Denny's.
The biggest compliment you got at your wedding was how cute your baby was.
You had a marriage license before you had a drivers license.
You've ever reused wedding invitations.
The last thing your ex-wife ever said to you was "It's me or them dogs."
If your wedding invitations ever said "same time same place."
At your wedding reception you put Alka-Seltzer in cheap wine to get "Champagne."
ID: 13883
Redneck
How do you know if a family tree is a redneck's?
The family tree goes straight down.
ID: 15047
Redneck
How many dicks can a redneck girl take at a time?
It depends on how many brothers she has.
ID: 10754
Redneck
You fart and you are proud of the smell
ID: 15254
Redneck
Gull - A young female.
Hale - Where General Sherman went for what he did to Etlanna.
Moanin - Between daybreak and noon.
Motuhsickle - A two-wheeled missile with a powerful engine.
Nekkid - To be unclothed.
Ovair - In that direction.
Own - Instead of awf.
Phrasin - Very cold.
Sebmup - Soft drink similar to ginger ale.
Show - "It show is hot today."
Spearmint - Something scientist do.
Stow - Place where things are sold.
Tal - What you dry off with after you take a share.
Uhmukin - Someone who lives in the United States of Uhmurka.
Zackly – Precisely.
ID: 15103
Redneck
Your email address ends in "@over.yonder.com".
You have a bumper sticker on your truck that says "My other computer is a laptop".
You've ever doubled the value of your truck by installing a cellular phone.
Your spell checker knows words like, "Y'all", "Yonder" and "Reckon".
You've ever used a CD-ROM as a coaster to set your beer on.
Your laptop has a sticker on it that says "Protected by Smith & Wesson".
You've used jumper cables to wire your network.
Your wife said "either she or the computer had to go" and you still don't miss her.
You start all your emails with "Hey Bubba", or "Howdy Y'all".
ID: 10858
Redneck
You think "Going the extra mile" means using toothpaste.
You take a bar of soap to your local pool.
Your dentures have fillings.
Your idea of conservation is moving your Saturday night bath to every other Saturday night.
Your wife has ever burnt out an electric razor.
Your medical plan is not to get sick.
ID: 15255
Redneck
Redneck Compliments
- Cute as a sack full of puppies.
- If things get any better, I may have to hire someone to help me enjoy it.
- Gooder than grits.
ID: 8207
Redneck
You're a redneck if:
The only thing you swing a bat at is a mailbox.
+10,000 Jokes