ID: 12838
Redneck
You know you're from Oklahoma if:
a tornado warning siren is your signal to go out in the yard and look for a funnel.
your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway.
you ever had to switch from heat to A/C in the same day.
you see people wear bib overalls at funerals.
little smokies are something you serve only for "special occasions".
you refer to the capital of Oklahoma as "The City".
you know cowpies are not made from beef.
someone you know has used a football schedule to plan their wedding date.
you have know someone who has had one belt buckle bigger than your fist.
you aren't surprised to find movie rental, ammunition, and bait all in the same store.
your "place at the lake" has wheels under it.
you learned to shoot a 12 guage shot gun before you learned to multiply.
And finally, you are 100% Oklahoman if you have ever heard or been a part of this conversation:
"Ya wanna coke?"
"Yeah."
"What kind?"
ID: 15058
Redneck
While visiting a relative in Chicago, a University of Alabama student went to a party where he met a very attractive co-ed. Attempting to strike up a conversation with her, he asked, "Where does you go to school?"
The co-ed, not at all impressed with his grammar or southern drawl, thought she would at least be polite and answer.
"Yale," she said.
Taking a deep breath, the UA student shouted, "I says, where does you go to school?"
ID: 15059
Redneck
Why do the Arkansas cheerleaders wear bibs?
To keep the tobacco juice off their uniforms.
ID: 15253
Redneck
Ah - The things you see with.
Ay-rab - The people who inhabit much of North Africa.
Bidness - The art of selling something for more than you paid for it.
Bobbycue - A delectable Southern sandwich of chopped pork, coleslaw, and a fiery sauce.
Bud - Small feathered creature that flies.
Chekatawfarya - Heard at service stations in small Southern towns.
Co-Cola - Soft drink.
Crine - Weeping.
Dawfins - Name of the professional football team in Miami.
Doc - A condition caused by the absence of light.
Etlanna - The city General Sherman burned during the war for Southern independence.
Everthang - All-encompassing.
Foller - Spies and private detectives spend a lot of time doing this.
Git - To acquire.
Goff - A game played with clubs and a little white ball.
ID: 15254
Redneck
Gull - A young female.
Hale - Where General Sherman went for what he did to Etlanna.
Moanin - Between daybreak and noon.
Motuhsickle - A two-wheeled missile with a powerful engine.
Nekkid - To be unclothed.
Ovair - In that direction.
Own - Instead of awf.
Phrasin - Very cold.
Sebmup - Soft drink similar to ginger ale.
Show - "It show is hot today."
Spearmint - Something scientist do.
Stow - Place where things are sold.
Tal - What you dry off with after you take a share.
Uhmukin - Someone who lives in the United States of Uhmurka.
Zackly – Precisely.
ID: 15785
Redneck
...you cut the grass and find a Car.
ID: 15766
Redneck
You might be a redneck if...
You can remember every NASCAR driver and their car number but can't remember how old your children are.
ID: 14890
Redneck
- You have a Hefty bag for a convertible top.
- Your belt buckle weighs more than three pounds.
- You have an Elvis Jell-o mold.
- You own more cowboy boots than sneakers.
- You've been to a funeral and there were more pick-ups than cars.
- You have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis over your fireplace.
- You just bought an 8-track player to put in your car.
- There are four or more cars up on blocks in the front yard.
ID: 16997
Redneck
They're fat
+10,000 Jokes