REDNECK

ID: 12258

Redneck

Family Reunion

Q: What do you call a redneck family reunion?

A: An orgy!

ID: 12610

Redneck

How to Talk Native Southern IV

Rainch - A big cow farm.
Rat - Do it rat now!
Rench - Rench the soap yourself.
Roont - She plum roont her shoes.
Salary - A stringy vegetable.
Soardeens - Small canned fish.
Shar - A light rain.
Gully Worsher - A medium heavy rain.
Toad strangler - A heavy rain Sody.
Pop - A soft drink.
Sprang - Water out'n the ground.
Shurf - The Shurf put Clem in jail.
Storch - This here aprn has too much storch in it.
Skeered - that plumb skeered me to death.
Thanks - He shore thanks he's smart.
Tho - Tho me the ball.
Thoat - I shore got a sore thoat.
War - A bobbed war fance.
Worsh - Go worsh your face.
Warter - What you worsh your face in.
Yurp - A continent overseas.

ID: 5375

Redneck

How Do You Know If You're a Redneck?

How do you know if you're a redneck?


If you go to a cousin's wedding looking for a girlfriend.

ID: 11573

Redneck

Yardy-yar..

Okay sooo.. I kinda stumbled across this "word" when I was actually at the sprint store with my x-boyfriend. He was talking about how he needed to get unlimited text messaging and I looked over with a very concerned look on my face and said, "Yardy Yar!" I believe everyone in the store was hysterical and looked at me as if I was some crazy redneck - it was hilarious.
If you don't get it,
it is supposed to sound like -
"You already are."
It's actually pretty dang funny if you say it out loud!! haha

ID: 8314

Redneck

You are a Redneck If... #14

You are a redneck if:

you've ever had to towel dry after a fart.

ID: 13476

Redneck

Ice Fishing Version 3

There were two guys from Alabama who love to fish, and they wanted to try some ice fishing.

They'd heard about it up in Canada, and they took off for up there. The lakes were frozen nicely. They stopped just before they got to a lake at a little bait shop and got all their tackle. One of them said, "We're going to need an ice pick."

So they got that, and they took off. In about two hours, one of them was back at the shop and said, "We're going to need another dozen ice picks."

Well, the fellow in the shop wanted to ask some questions, but he didn't. He sold him the picks, and the the guy left. In about an hour, he was back. "We're going to need all the ice picks you've got."

The bait man couldn't stand it any longer. "By the way," he asked, "how are you fellows doing?"

"Not very well at all," he said. "We don't even have the boat in the water yet."

ID: 1923

Redneck

Redneck Milk

How did the redneck die drinking milk?
The cow sat on him!

ID: 1700

Redneck

Fastfood

You might be a redneck if you think fast-food is hitting a dear at 65mph.

ID: 17708

Redneck

Battery XXX Boodler

Battery Fucked Boodler's ass hard and soft yesterday! Maybe zat explains z growth in z population recently!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

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