ID: 15121
Puns
Pirate Blackbeard's ship license had expired so he went into the shipping license office and got a new one, but on the new one he needed an updated photo of himself.
So, Pirate Blackbeard went into the photographer's room and asked to have his photo taken. The photographer obliged and said, "Ok, please pose front on" and took a photo.
He need to take another photo so he asked Blackbeard to "Please Poseidon!"
ID: 16921
Puns
Teacher: John, where are the Great Plains?
John: At the airport.
ID: 15165
Puns
With what kind of bread do elves make their sandwiches?
Shortbread!
ID: 15389
Puns
If Henry IV were cloned, would he be Henry V, or Henry IV Jr. or,
would he be Henry IV Part II?
(Willy Wagstaff, more usually known as William Shakespeare)
ID: 15317
Puns
After Receiving an Invitation to an Inventors' Ball:
Edison thought it would be an illuminating experience.
Watt reckoned it would be a good way to let off steam.
Stephenson thought the whole idea was loco.
Wilbur Wright accepted, provided he and Orville could get a flight.
Morse's reply: "I'll be there on the dot. Can't stop now must dash."
ID: 15360
Puns
Marble is a valuable building material and should not be taken for granite.
ID: 15350
Puns
Helen Waite is our credit manager. If you want credit, go to Helen Waite.
ID: 15164
Puns
The driver of a huge trailer lost control of his rig, plowed into an empty tollbooth and smashed it to pieces. He climbed down from the wreckage and within a matter of minutes, a truck pulled up and discharged a crew of workers.
The men picked up each broken piece of the former tollbooth and spread some kind of creamy substance on it. Then they began fitting the pieces together. In less than a half hour, they had the entire tollbooth reconstructed and looking good as new.
"Astonishing!" the truck driver said to the crew chief. "What was the white stuff you used to get all the pieces together?"
The crew chief said, "Oh, that was tollgate booth paste."
ID: 15174
Puns
Clones are people two.