ID: 15300
Puns
When a girl needs advice, why can't her brother help her?
Because he can't be a brother and assist her too.
(And a sister too!)
ID: 5278
Puns
What did the statue say to the other after a break-up and make-up?
I'm sorry I took you for granite. (granted)
hahahaha
ID: 870
Puns
A woman had twins, and gave them up for adoption. One of them went to a family in Egypt and was named Amal. The other went to a family in Spain, and they named him Juan. Years later, Juan sent a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she told her husband that she wished that she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responded, "But they're twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."
ID: 6312
Puns
This is a list of the worst names to have
Dick Hurtz
Hary Paratesticles
Mike Hunt
Mike Rotch
Anitta Manwhore
Anitta Johnson
Fuk Yao
Ike Anblow
Peter Pecker
I.C. Weiner
I.P. Freely
Seimore Butts
Bo Oobless
Dick Less
Issac Less
Tits McGee (ok, that was off Anchorman)
Ima Hornibusterd
Ima Uglibech
Ima Dick
ID: 6665
Puns
A man was on a game show. He was on his final question; all he had to do was answer that question right, and he would win 1 million dollars!
The game show host said, "All right, for your final question: 'What are the names of three of Santa's reindeer?'"
The man grinned and said, "Dasher!"
The game show host said, "Correct!"
"Comet!"
"Correct! What is the last name?"
The man yelled, "Olive!"
The game show host was confused and said, "Why Olive?"
The contestent looked at him strangely and said, "Oh, don't you know? 'Olive, the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names...'"
ID: 7326
Puns
Why are there no phone books in China?
Because there are so many Wing's and Wong's, they are afraid you will Wing the Wong number.
ID: 2105
Puns
A farmer was milking his cow. He was just starting to get a good rhythm going when a bug flew into the barn and started circling his head. Suddenly, the bug flew into the cow's ear. The farmer didn't think much about it, until the bug squirted out into his bucket. So the farmer says "Oh, shoot! It went in one ear and out the udder"...
ID: 2080
Puns
A test-tube baby has a womb with a view.
ID: 7301
Puns
This Kentucky horse breeder had a filly that won every race in which she was entered. But as she got older she became very temperamental. He soon found that when he raced her in the evening, she would win handily, but when she raced during the day she would come in dead last. He consulted the top veterinarians and horse psychologists to no avail. He finally had to give up because it had become a real night mare.
+10,000 Jokes