ID: 45
Puns
A polar bear walked into a bar and said
"Can I please have a gin and............................................tonic?"
The bartender replied "Sure, but why the large pause?"
"I don't know, I've always had them!"
ID: 13496
Puns
Are part-time band leaders semiconductors?
If athletes get athlete's foot, do astronauts get mistletoe?
Does killing time damage eternity?
Daylight savings time - why are they saving it and where do they keep it?
Do pilots in a hurry take crash-courses?
How do you get off a nonstop flight?
ID: 2828
Puns
Q. How did Darth Vader know what Luke Skywalker had for Christmas?
A. He felt his presence!
ID: 8089
Puns
It is obvious. The downfall of the world is here. It is 2005 and we have lived on this earth for ages. I suppose it is about time for the end.
Proof? You want proof? I have all the proof you will need:
They let Brittney Spears reproduce.
Ohh that poor poor child!!
ID: 8180
Puns
What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand?
Quattro Sinko.
ID: 9669
Puns
A woman meant to call a record store, but dialed the wrong number and got a private home instead. "Do you have 'Eyes of Blue' and 'A Love Supreme?'" she asked.
"Well, no," answered the puzzled homeowner. "But I have a wife and eleven children."
"Is that a record?" the caller inquired, puzzled in her turn.
"I don't think so," replied the man, "but it's as close as I want to get."
ID: 6261
Puns
Do you know what style of shoes a frog loves most?
Open toad!
ID: 1389
Puns
What do you call a bear who's into gardening?
A Hairy Potter!
ID: 8628
Puns
Q: Why did the scientist install a door knocker on his door and not a door bell?
A: He wanted to win the No-Bell (Nobel) prize!