ID: 13987
Puns
How does a rodeo star get around?
With a cattle-act.
ID: 11083
Puns
A boy go to a girls house and notice her home is very messy and full of paper and clay pot and clothing all over. The boy tell her he bring some pot to her and she answer there is clay pot all over home.
ID: 17308
Puns
I tried for years to snap my thumb and finger together - and suddenly it clicked!
ID: 14995
Puns
Thor: The Scandinavian god of acheth and painth.
ID: 8161
Puns
Two male flies are buzzing around, cruising for good looking female flies. One spots a real cutie sitting on a pile of horse manure and dives down toward her. "Pardon me," he says, turning on his best charm, "...but is this stool taken?"
ID: 10913
Puns
Everybody who has a dog calls it something like "Rover" or "Spot" or "Bruno" But I thought I'd call my dog "Sex."
Now my dog, Sex, has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to the city hall to renew his license, I told the clerk I would like a license for Sex. He said, "I'd like to have one too". Then I said, "But this is a dog." He said he didn't care what she looked like. Then I said, "You don't understand. I've had Sex since I was nine years old." He said that I must have been quite a kid.
When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with us. I told the hotel clerk that I wanted a room for my wife and me, and a special room for Sex. He said that every room in the hotel was for sex. So I finally said, "You don't understand. Sex keeps me awake at night." The clerk said, "Me too."
One day I entered Sex in a contest, but before the competition began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just standing there looking around. I told him I had planned to have Sex in the contest. He told me that I should have sold my own tickets. "But you don't understand," I told him, "I had hoped to have Sex on TV." HE called me a show-off.
When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I told the judge, "Your honor, I had Sex before I was married." The judge said, "Me too." Then I told him that after I was married, Sex left me. He said, "Me too."
Last night Sex ran away. I spent hours looking for him around town. A cop came over to me and asked, "What are you doing in this alley at four o'clock in the morning?" I told him, "I'm looking for Sex."
My trial comes up Friday :-(
ID: 3496
Puns
What is a plant's favorite school year?
KinderGARDEN!!!
ID: 3652
Puns
First, you get a little hoarse.
Then, you get a little buggy.
ID: 4676
Puns
Q: Why didn't Cain please God?
A: Because he just wasn't Able.
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