ID: 12422
Puns
Do bakers with a sense of humor bake wry bread?
ID: 7027
Puns
Q: What did the little chick say when his mom laid an orange?
A: Look at the orange-mama-lade!
ID: 10611
Puns
What do scientists use to freshen their breath?
Experi-mints
ID: 6537
Puns
What do you call a Spanish man with a rubber toe?
Answer: Roberto.
ID: 14158
Puns
If there is H2O on the inside of a fire hydrant, what is on the outside?
K9P.
ID: 11632
Puns
Two ships, one carrying lots of red paint, the other carrying lots of purple paint, crashed on a desert island.
The drivers are now marooned.
ID: 6458
Puns
A family of moles had been hibernating all winter. One beautiful spring morning, they woke up. The father mole stuck his head out of the hole and looked around. "Mother Mole!" He called back down the hole. "Come up here! I smell honey, fresh made honey!" The mother mole ran up and squeezed in next to him. "That's not honey, that's maple syrup! I smell maple syrup!" The baby mole, still down in the hole, was sulking. "I can't smell anything down here but molasses..."
ID: 6979
Puns
A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: "A beer please, and one for the road."
ID: 7816
Puns
A man was out of work, and he was combing through the want ads. He saw that a school was looking for a bus driver, so he called and was asked to come for an interview. He got the job, and was surprised when he went out and found that the bus was garishly painted with Big Bird, Bert & Ernie, and Elmo. Still, a job's a job, he thought.
As he went about his route, he stopped and picked up twin girls. These girls were rather portly, and as they entered the bus the first one said, "My name's Patty." The man asked the second twin her name and she said, "My name's Patty also."
Further along, there was a boy who was trying to put on a James Dean-esque cool image. As he got on the bus, he said, "Yo! I'm Leonard T." He sat in the seat right behind the driver, so the driver could see him in his mirror.
They were almost back to the school, and made one last stop. The kid who got on announced, "I'm Ross... and I'm special."
As they made their way back to the school, the driver noticed to his disgust that the kid sitting right behing him had removed one shoe to reveal a horrible case of bunions, which he was picking at.
As soon as they got to school, the man went to the principal's office, threw down the bus keys on his desk, and announced he was quitting. "Is something wrong?" asked the principal?
"I can't take this!" yelled the man. "I've got two all beef Pattys, special Ross, Leonard T. picking bunions on a Sesame Street bus!"
+10,000 Jokes