NEWS / POLITICS

ID: 12786

News / Politics

Joke of the Day

George W. Bush....









































that's it

ID: 4994

News / Politics

Cows

Cows

Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that our government can track a cow born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where she sleeps in the state of Washington, and they can track her calves to their stalls.

But they are unable to locate 11 million illegal aliens wandering around our country. Maybe we should give them all a cow.

ID: 6802

News / Politics

Politics

Politics - A strife of interests masquerading as a contest
of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage

ID: 10007

News / Politics

More Clinton 3

What is Bill's definition of safe sex?
When Hillary is out of town.

ID: 96

News / Politics

Tragedy

A squad of American soldiers was patrolling the Iraqi border, when they came across a badly mangled dead body. As they got closer, they found it was an Iraqi soldier.
A short distance up the road, they found a badly mangled American soldier in a ditch on the other side of the road, struggling to breathe. They ran to him, cradled his bruised head and asked him what had happened.

"Well," he whispered, "I was walking down this road, armed to the teeth when I came across this heavily armed Iraqi border guard. I looked him right in the eye and shouted, 'Saddam Hussein is a moronic, deceitful, lying piece of trash!'"

"He looked me right in the eye and shouted back, 'George W. Bush is a moronic, deceitful, lying piece of trash too!'"

"We were standing there shaking hands when the truck hit us."

ID: 17487

News / Politics

Socialism

Two Berlin children spoke to each other over the wall. The little girl in the West says, while eating a banana, "Look - I have a banana."

The boy in the East doesn't want to be inferior to her in anything and says, full of pride: "We have socialism." The girl counters: "So, we'll have socialism soon too."

The boy, triumphant: "See, then you won't have any bananas any more either!"

ID: 13574

News / Politics

Hoya!

It was election time and a politician decided to go out to the local reservation and try to get the Native American vote. They were all assembled in the Council Hall to hear the speech. The politician had worked up to his finale, and the crowd was getting more and more excited. "I promise better education opportunities for Native Americans!"
The crowd went wild, shouting "Hoya! Hoya!"
The politician was a bit puzzled by the native word, but was encouraged by their enthusiasm. "I promise gambling reforms to allow a Casino on the Reservation!" "Hoya! Hoya!" cried the crowd, stomping their feet.
"I promise more social reforms and job opportunities for Native Americans!" The crowd reached a frenzied pitch shouting "Hoya! Hoya! Hoya!"
After the speech, the Politician was touring the Reservation, and saw a tremendous herd of cattle. Since he was raised on a ranch, and knew a bit about cattle, he asked the Chief if he could get closer to take a look at the cattle.
"Sure," the Chief said, "but be careful not to step in the hoya."

ID: 16123

News / Politics

It's the End of the World

It's the end of the world as we know it...

and I feel fine...

Bill Clinton, Boris Yeltsin, and Bill Gates were called in by God. God informed them that he was very unhappy about what was going on in this world. Since things were so bad he told the three of them that he was destroying the Earth in 3 days. They were all allowed to return to their homes and businesses and tell their friends and colleagues what was happening. God did tell them though that no matter what they did he was not changing his mind. So...

Bill Clinton went in and told his staff, "I have good news and bad news for you. First the good news. There is a God. The bad news is that he is destroying the Earth in 3 days."

Boris Yeltsin went back and told his staff, "I have bad news and bad news. The first is there is a God. The second is that he is destroying the Earth in 3 days."

Bill Gates went back and told his staff.... "I have good news and good news. Firstly, God thinks I am one of the 3 most important people in the world. The second is, we don't have to fix the bugs in Windows95."

ID: 17888

News / Politics

Water Bottle

What's the difference between a water bottle and puberty?

The water bottle hit Justin Bieber first.

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