ID: 8714
Men / Women
How women think about sex:
At 8, ignore it.
At 18, experience it.
At 28, look for it.
At 38, ask for it.
At 48, beg for it.
At 58, pay for it.
At 68, pray for it.
At 78, forget it.
ID: 16943
Men / Women
Every day, Mr. Koch has to cross the river by ferry in order to get to work.
Waking up late one morning, he dressed quickly, ran out the door and raced to the dock. The boat was several yards away, and stepping back and taking a mighty leap, Mr. Koch landed with a crash on the deck.
"Made it!" he cried triumphantly.
"So?" said one of the passengers, "What was the rush? The boat is coming in."
ID: 9616
Men / Women
There was once a wife so jealous that when her husband came home one night and she couldn't find hairs on his jackets she yelled at him, "Great, so now you're cheating on me with a bald woman!"
The next night, when she didn't smell any perfume, she yelled again by saying, "She's not only bald, but she's too cheap to buy any perfume!"
ID: 9846
Men / Women
Friendships between women:
A woman didn't come home one night. The next day she told her husband that she had slept over at a friend's house. The man called his wife's 10 best friends. None of them knew about it.
Friendships between men:
A man didn't come home one night. The next day he told his wife that he had slept over at a friend's house. The woman called her husband's 10 best friends. Eight of them confirmed that yes, he had slept over and two claimed that he was still there.
ID: 8411
Men / Women
Why don't vegetarian women scream during orgasms?
They refuse to admit that a piece of meat gives them pleasure!
ID: 7825
Men / Women
A gay couple (of guys) and a lesbian couple decide to leave from New York to Miami at the same time. The two couples are neighbors and they plan on driving the same route. so the question is who gets to Miami first?
Why the lesbians of course!
They go lickety split while the guys are still at home packin'.
ID: 8746
Men / Women
Someday your prince charming will come. Mine just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.
ID: 11188
Men / Women
After years of hiding the fact that the love is gone, Mom and Dad announced to their grown children that they're getting a divorce.
The kids were totally distraught and, as a stab at keeping their parents together, arranged a series of sessions for the whole family with a world-famous marriage counselor.
The counselor worked for hours, tried all of his methods and tricks, but the parents wouldn't even talk to each other.
Finally, he walked over to a closet, brought out an oboe, and began to play. After a minute or so, the parents started talking and, as the counselor continued soloing on the oboe, the couple discovered they're not that far apart and decided to give their marriage another try.
The children were amazed and asked the counselor how he managed to do it. He replied, "Simple. I've never seen a couple that wouldn't talk through an oboe solo."
ID: 8718
Men / Women
The cat was chasing the rooster around on the farm, then the cat fell in the water and the rooster laughed. Lesson: For every wet pussy there is a happy cock
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