ID: 13265
Medical
Dickiedoo Disease: defined as the expansion of the adominal region of the human male to the point where it eliminates the view of the male's private part from its possessor. Translated into a more commonly used phrase "His belly sticks out further than his Dickiedoo!
Also know as Abdominalius Humongus and in some cases where the male appendage is not very large, this condition is known as Male Apparatus Non-existus.
ID: 4471
Medical
This is a true story that happened in a South African hospital.
There was this case in the hospital where a patient always died in the same bed and on a Friday morning regardless of his medical condition. This puzzles the doctors and some even think it has something to do with the supernatural.
One day, all the doctors decide to go down to the ward where it always happens on the Friday mornings. They want to take a look at what's going on. Friday morning comes and everyone's at the hospital ward waiting for the terrible phenomenon to occur again. Right at the expected time, the cleaner comes in and unplugs the life support system so that she can use the vacuum!
ID: 16247
Medical
A man limped into a hospital to have his foot X-rayed, and was asked to wait for the results.
Some time later an orderly appeared and handed the man a large pill. Just then a mother with a small child in need of immediate attention entered.
After the orderly disappeared with the new patient, the man hobbled over to get a glass of water, swallow the pill, and sat down to wait. Some time later the orderly reappeared carrying a bucket of water.
"Okay," he said, "Just drop the pill in this bucket and soak your foot for a while."
ID: 716
Medical
An 86 year old man walked into a crowded doctor's office. As he approached the desk, the receptionist said, "Yes sir, what are you seeing the doctor for today?"
"There's something wrong with my penis," he replied.
The receptionist became irritated and said, "You shouldn't come into a crowded office and say things like that."
"Why not? You asked me what was wrong and I told you," he said.
The receptionist replied, "You've obviously caused some embarrassment in this room full of people. You should have said there is something wrong
with your ear or something and then discussed the problem further with the doctor in private."
The man walked out, waited several minutes and then re-entered.
The receptionist smiled smugly and asked, "Yes?"
"There's something wrong with my ear," he stated. The receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken her advice.
"And what is wrong with your ear, Sir?"
"I can't piss out of it," the man replied.
ID: 17880
Medical
A man was having a serious surgical operation. When he woke up, he asked his doctor, "Did it go well?"
"It went perfectly."
"Then why do I have this headache?"
"Oh, that. Halfway through the operation, we ran out of anesthetic."
ID: 713
Medical
Jack tells his shrink, "Last night I dreamed you were my mother."
"How did you feel about it after you woke up?" asks the psychiatrist.
"I overslept," answers Jack. "Then I remembered I had an appointment with you, so I grabbed a Coke and some cookies for breakfast and came right over. I didn't really have time to think about it. What does it mean, doc?"
"A Coke and some cookies?" says the psychiatrist. "You call that breakfast?"
ID: 12696
Medical
Guy goes to see his doctor - "Doctor, please help me, I've got kleptomania bad!"
"OK, take these pills, one a day, but if they've not worked in a month, could you get me an LCD telly?"
ID: 10580
Medical
A blind man walks into a store with his seeing eye dog. All of a sudden, he picks up the leash and begins swinging the dog over his head.
The manager runs up to the man and asks, "What are you doing?!!"
The blind man replies, "Just looking around."
ID: 7929
Medical
A woman goes for her pelvic exam. While the doctor is doing the exam, he notices bikini tan lines, and she has sandals on that say "hecho en mexico" (made in mexico). So he casually asks her, "So did you enjoy your trip to Mexico?"
She sits up a little and stares at him with this look of disbelief. "You can tell that just from a pelvic exam?!?!?"
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