ID: 8049
Gross
The was a man named Jimmy who was on a job interview in another state that he didn't know very well. While he was driving he became very tired. Noticing there were no hotels in sight, he pulled over in the driveway and knocked on the door. A old man in his 60s greeted him.
"Hi, Im sorry to disturb you, but I am very tired. May I sleep here just for tonight?" Jimmy asked.
The old man cleared his thoat and said,"Well, I don't have any more rooms available, but you can sleep with my daughter if you don't disturb her."
Jimmy nodded his head and agreed, and the old man showed him the room. "See you in the morning," said the old man.
Jimmy stripped his clothes off and got into the bed. He fell asleep right away. The only problem was he keep waking up when he touched the farmers daughter.
Morning finally came around and he went downstairs. The old man was at the stove cooking some breakfast.
"Your daughter was really cold last night and it's really weird how she doesn't toss and turn, even when a stranger is in her bed," Jimmy said.
" Well, what did you expect? We're going to bury her today."
ID: 7655
Gross
Did u here Michael Jackson is sick?
He had a 10 year old penis!!!
ID: 4522
Gross
I slide to first.
I feel like I'm going to burst.
Diarrhea, diarrhea.
I slide to two.
My pants are filled with goo.
Diarrhea, diarrhea.
I slide to third.
I dropped a runny turd.
Diarrhea, diarrhea.
I slide to home.
My pants are filled with foam.
Diarrhea, diarrhea.
First its in the pants, then its on the floor.
I make a 20 yard dash to the bathroom door.
Some people think its funny.
Its coming out back runny.
Well, diarrhea.
ID: 9017
Gross
How many feet does a black rooster have?
How many wings does a black rooster have?
How many heads does a black rooster have?
How many hairs are on the back of a white cat?
Why is it that you know more about a black cock rather than a white pussy?
ID: 618
Gross
This American is on a business trip to Mexico and has the first day off. He decides he wants to ride a donkey, a traditional Mexican thing.
He asks this local man if he can rent a donkey for the day. The man says, "Gringo we call them asses here in Mexico. If you want him to stop though you need to scratch him." The American agrees and pays the Mexican man his money and rides away.
The man then decides that he wants something to eat so he rides to a hot dog stand. He asks the man if he can get a hot dog with mustard and relish. The man then replies "Sir, we call them weeners here." The American agrees and hands the man his money.
He then sees that his donkey is slowly walking away. So he asks another man standing by him who is also American if he would "hold his weener so he can scratch his ass"
ID: 744
Gross
A drunk stumbles into a confessional.
The priest on the other side hears someone enter but yet the man does not speak.
So the priest knocks on the wall of the confessional and hears the drunk say, "Forget it buddy, theres no toiletpaper in this one either!"
ID: 16821
Gross
One day little Billy went screaming to his mom, "Mommy! Mommy! Theres a shrimp stuck between grandma's legs!"
His mother, intruiged by this, brought Billy to grandma, who was sleeping on the bed with her legs apart.
The mother looked and laughed and said, "Why, that's not a shrimp! That's her privates, a vagina!"
Billy smiled and said, "Really? It sure tastes like shrimp..."
ID: 7416
Gross
Cecil and Scott are two homosexuals living together. It was extremely hot one day and Cecil arrived home to find Scott with his ass in the freezer.
"Scott! What are you doing with your ass in the freezer?"
Scott replied, "It was so hot outside, I thought you'd like something cool to slip into!"
ID: 15510
Gross
A guy in sitting in a bar hving a drink. All of a sudden an alien sits down next to him, licks its finger and sticks it in the guys ear. The guy's a little annoyed, but doesn't say anything. The next thing he knows, the alien does it again. this time the guy tells him to quit. Five minutes later, it happens again. This time he yells at him to stop. Ten minutes later, he finds a finger in his ear. Finally, he jumps up and screams, "If you don't quit I'm gonna rip your balls off!". the alien thinks about it for a second, and does it again. The guy jumps up, pulls its pants down, but there was nothing there! In frustration he asks, "How do you screw?!"
the alien smiles and sticks his finger in the guys ear.
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