ID: 1968
Blond
Two blondes are walking down the road when one says ''Look at that dog with one eye!''
The other blonde covers one of her eyes and says ''Where?''
ID: 1135
Blond
Did you hear about the sailor who died, and wanted to be buried at sea by his 5 blonde daughters?
His daughters all drowned digging the grave.
ID: 10097
Blond
1 What is the difference between a smart blonde and Bigfoot?
Bigfoot has been spotted.
2 How do you drown a blonde?
Put a mirror at the bottom of the pool.
3 What's the blonde's cheer?
"I'm blonde, I'm blonde, I'm B.L.O.N....ah, oh well...
4 What do you get when you offer a blonde a penny for her thoughts?
Change.
5 How does a blonde moonwalk?
She pulls down her panties and slides her butt along the floor!
ID: 545
Blond
What do you call a blonde behind a steering wheel?
An Air-Bag
ID: 664
Blond
What do you call a smart blond?
An Endangered species
ID: 984
Blond
A trucker has just turned a corner on a deserted roadway and was proceeding to change lanes when a blonde in a speedy corvette cut right in front of him almost making him get run off the road. Enraged the trucker sped up and overtook the blonde then forced her to slow down. When the blonde finally stopped the trucker stepped out of his truck, went over the to corvette and yanked the blonde out.
He then drew a circle with a piece of chalk he had around the blonde.
"If you step outside of this circle, I will kill you. You hear? You just stay right there missy," said the Trucker.
The trucker went to his truck and grabbed a wooden bat. He smashed the corvettes windows in and knocked off the rear-view mirror. Then he stops and hears a tiny giggle. He turns around and the blonde is trying not to laugh.
He turns back to work and stabs the tires with his swiss army knife, then smashes in the car windows. Then he hears a snicker from behind him. He turns around and the blonde is red from trying to hold in a laugh. Getting angry the trucker proceeds to smash the taillights, and dent the hell out of the cars body. Wanting to completely obliterate the car, he went into his semi-truck and ran over the car crushing it into a flattened piece of metal.
As he gets out to admire his demolition work, he sees the blonde on the ground laughing like a madwoman and rolling around holding her sides.
He goes and grabs the blonde by her hair and yells in her face, "WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING YOU FOOL??"
The blonde tries to put on a straight face and says, "While you were looking away, I stepped out of the circle 3 TIMES!"
ID: 4602
Blond
A beautiful blonde goes into a bar and sits down next to a guy that's so homely looking, he hasn't had a date in over a year, also, he's sooooo dumb that one night he slept with a ruler next to his head to see how long he slept.
He figures that he has absolutely no chance in the world to score a date with this ravishing buxom blonde, when suddenly she
strikes up a conversation with him! Soon they become rather chummy. It starts to get late and the bartender calls out last drink for alcohol. The blonde leans over to the guy and says,
"Let's have this last drink at my apartment."
Taken back by her request, and trembling, the guy finally utters
the word, "Okay."
They get up from the bar stool arm and arm headed for the door. The blonde stops him and says, "Before we go back to my apartment there's one thing I have to tell you, I'm on my menstrual cycle."
He says, ..."That's ok, I'll follow you in my Honda."
ID: 283
Blond
A blonde has just inherited a Ranch but only had two horses. The problem was she couldn't tell them apart. So she goes to her neighbor rancher and asks for help. He suggests cutting ones tail a bit shorter then the other. She does it but then a week later she comes back and tells the neighbor rancher that it grew back. So he tells her to tie a different colored string around one of the horses neck. She does it but a week later the tie slips off and she has to go back to the neighbor. So he suggest she paint a different color spot on each of the horses. She does and comes back a week later with cookies.
She tells the neighbor rancher, "Here I baked these for you. Your plan worked perfectly. I painted a red spot on the black horse and a blue spot on the white horse."
ID: 1008
Blond
How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None, blondes usually screw in cars!
+10,000 Jokes