ID: 10485
Blond
1) What do you say to a Blonde that won't give in?
"Have another beer."
2) What's the difference between a blonde and a solar powered calculator?
The blonde works in the dark!
3) How do you keep a blonde busy for hours?
Scroll down...
Scroll up...
4) So a blonde is walking down the street and she stops to ask a
man the time, he says "O, it's uhh...4:45." The blonde
responds, "Man, I've been asking that question all day and I get
a different answer every time!
5) Superman, Batman, and a smart blonde all died on the same day.Which one got to Heaven first?
None of them.They are all make-believe.
ID: 6992
Blond
Three men are fishing. One catches a magic fish that will grant each one a wish if they let him go.
The first one wishes he could double his IQ. It is done.
The second one wishes to triple his IQ. It is done.
The last one (who is an idiot) wishes to multiply his IQ by a 1/2. The fish asks if he is sure; the man nods.
When the fish grants his wish, he turns into a blond.
ID: 7643
Blond
A young blonde stock broker was bored with driving her BMW. It lacked individuality and besides that, every other girl in the office had one. She fancied something a bit more individual, perhaps an MG convertible.
That week she visited her local car dealer and spied a beautiful Jaguar XK140 convertible. It was wonderfully restored and she fell in love with its gorgeous red paint job. An empty check stub later, and off she was tearing down the leafy country lanes enjoying her beautiful new car. Her long blonde hair was flowing in the wind, music blaring from the radio, what could possibly go wrong?
At that thought there was a splutter from the engine and the car coasted to a stop. She got out and lifted the bonnet and concluded after a few minutes that she didn't have a bloody clue what was wrong. Luckily she had her mobile phone with her, and a quick phone call to the AutoClub and a short wait saw a bright shiny yellow van pull up behind her.
"That's a lovely car," said the mechanic. "What seems to be the matter?" "Well, it just conked out I'm afraid."
"Let me have look." He set to work and ten minutes later the engine was purring like a cat again.
"Thank goodness," she said. "What was the matter?" "Simple really, just crap in the carburetor," he replied.
Looking shocked she asked, "Oh, OK... How many times a week do I have to do that?"
ID: 7771
Blond
A blond goes into a pizza shop for a snack. She orders, "May I have a veggie pizza slice with all the works?"
The worker says, "That would be our combo pizza."
The blond says, "No, thanks. I'll stay with the veggie slice."
ID: 8020
Blond
A blonde was at a department store for the first time and was very confused.
The man beside her was getting irritated at the blonde because she kept asking him so many questions about the store.
He said, "Please! Just stop asking me so many questions!"
"Oh," the blonde replied. "Why?"
ID: 8187
Blond
Q) What does a blond say when she comes out of a lesbian bar?
A) Wow, those people sure were friendly!
ID: 8428
Blond
Why did the blond have blisters on her lips?
From trying to blow out lightbulbs!
ID: 8219
Blond
There's a man with three daughters.
The first daughter(a Brunette) comes up and says "Daddy why'd you name me Daisy" the dad says" 'cause when you were born a daisy fell on your head."
The second daughter (a red-head) comes up and says "Daddy why'd you name me Rose" the dad says "'cause when you were born a rose fell on your head."
The third daughter (a blonde) comes up and says "kjaglifvgjlfj" the dad says "SHUTUP CINDERBLOCK"
ID: 10522
Blond
1 Why don't blondes eat bananas?
They can't find the zipper.
2 Why don't blondes use vibrators?
They chip their teeth.
3 Why don't blondes in San Francisco wear short black mini skirts?
Cause their balls show.
4 Why don't a blondes eyes fall out of her when she stands?
The vacuum in her head keeps them in place.
5 What does a blonde answer to the question "Are you sexually active?"
"No, I just lie there."
+10,000 Jokes