ID: 3717
Blond
A blond named Pam is appearing on "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire" with Regis Philbin
Regis: "Pam, you're up to $500,000 with one lifeline left: phone a friend. If you get it right, the next question is worth one million dollars. If you get it wrong, you drop back to $32,000. Are you ready?"
Pam: "Yes."
Regis: "Which of the following birds does not build its own nest? Is it A) robin, B) sparrow, C) cuckoo, or D) thrush."
Pam: "I'd like to phone a friend. I'd like to call Carol."
Carol (also a blond) answers the phone: "Hello?"
Regis: "Hello Carol, it's Regis Philbin from Who Wants to be a Millionaire. I have your friend Pam here who needs your help to answer the one million dollar question. The next voice you hear will be Pam's..."
Pam: "Carol, which of the following birds does not build it's own nest? Is it A) robin, B) sparrow, C) cuckoo, or D) thrush."
Carol: "Oh geez, Pam. That's simple. It's a cuckoo."
Pam: "Are you sure?" Carol: "I'm sure."
Regis: "Pam, you heard Carol. Do you keep the $500,000 or play for the million?"
Pam: "I want to play; I'll go with C) cuckoo."
Regis:" Is that your final answer?"
Pam: "Yes."
Regis: "Are you confident?"
Pam: "Yes; I think Carol's pretty smart."
Regis: "You said C) cuckoo... And you're right! Congratulations, you have just won ONE MILLION DOLLARS!"
To celebrate, Pam flies Carol to New York. That night they go out on the town. As they're sipping champagne, Pam looks at Carol and asks her," Tell me, how did you know that it was the cuckoo that does not build its own nest?"
Pam, "it was easy," replies her (blond) friend. "Everybody knows that cuckoos live in clocks."
ID: 3358
Blond
A blonde was recently hired at an office. Her first task was to go out for coffee.
Eager to do well her first day on the job, she grabbed a large thermos and hurried to a nearby coffee shop.
She held up the thermos and the coffee shop worker quickly came over to take her order.
"Is this big enough to hold six cups of coffee?" the blonde asked.
The coffee shop worker looked at the thermos, hesitated a few seconds, then finally replied, "Yeah. It looks like about six cups to me."
"Oh good!" the blonde sighed in relief.
"Then give me two regular, two black, and two decaf."
ID: 2307
Blond
A blond got a new job cutting down trees. On the first day her boss handed her a chainsaw and said,
"Now you have to go into that forest and cut down as many trees as possible using that chain saw. Please be careful with it and also please remember that the minimum is 6 trees a day."
The blonde went into the forest and cut down trees but at the end of the day she had only managed to cut down 4.
Her boss decided to give another chance but the next day she only managed 3. He decided to give her one last chance but on the third day she only cut two trees.
When she finished work, he called the blond over and took her back into the forest.
"Right,"he said,"You must be doing something wrong here so watch how I do it, then I'll give you one more chance before you're fired.
So he stood in front of the tree and started up the chainsaw. The blond looked around suddenly and said,
"What's that noise?"
ID: 2169
Blond
What did the blonde say when she saw the sign in front of the YMCA?
"Look! They have spelt MACY'S wrong!"
ID: 3177
Blond
Once a blond police officer stopped a man and asked for his driving license.
She saw it and told the man "it says here that you must wear glasses"
The man said "I have contacts"
The blond said "I don't care who you know, you are still getting a traffic ticket"
ID: 2443
Blond
A girl came skipping home from school one day.
"Mommy, Mommy," she yelled, "we were counting today, and all the other kids could only count to four, but I counted to 10. See? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10!"
"Very good," said her mother.
"Is it because I'm blonde?" the girl said.
"Yes, it's because you're blonde," said the mommy.
The next day the girl came skipping home from school. "Mommy, Mommy,"
she yelled, "we were saying the alphabet today, and all the other kids could only say it to D, but I said it to G. See? A, B, C, D, E, F, G!"
"Very good," said her mother.
"Is it because I'm blonde, Mommy?"
"Yes, it's because you're blonde."
The next day the girl came skipping home from school. Mommy, Mommy,"
she yelled, "we were in gym class today, and when we showered, all the other girls had flat chests, but I have these!" And she lifted her tank top to reveal a pair of 36Cs.
"Very good," said her embarrassed mother.
"Is it because I'm blonde, mommy?"
"No honey, it's because you're 24."
ID: 669
Blond
What is more stupid then a brunette trying to start a fire in a pool?
A blonde trying to put it out.
ID: 42
Blond
What does a blonde say when she loses her virginity?
"So are you guys all on the same team?"
ID: 1858
Blond
Q: What's black, blue, brown and laying in a ditch?
A: A brunette who's told too many blonde jokes.
+10,000 Jokes