ID: 17983
Blond
One day, a blonde goes into a store. She gets an item and walks up to the cashier. She says,"I'd like to buy this TV".
He says,"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes".
The next day, she dyes her hair red and goes back in the store, but the same thing happens.
Finally, she shaves her head and goes back in. When she tries to buy it for the third time, the man refuses.
She says, "How the hell do you know I'm blonde?".
He replied, "First of all, that's a microwave."
ID: 11780
Blond
There were three women that had just escaped from jail, one was a brunette, one was a red-head, and one was a blonde. They were running through the woods and the police and their dogs were chasing after them. The women ran into three empty potato sacks. They decided to hide.
A policeman found the sacks and decided to give the first one a kick. It meowed. "Aww, it's a sack full of kittens," he said. He kicked the second bag and it barked. "Aww, it's a sack full of puppies," he said. He kicked the third one and it didn't do anything. He kicked it again and it didn't do anything. He was about to kick it again when the blonde popped out of it and said, "I can't act like potatoes if you keep kicking me, duh!"
ID: 11870
Blond
A blonde was filling out an application form. She quickly filled in the columns for Name; Age; Address et c.
When she came to the column Salary Expected, she put "Yes."
At an air show, the blonde turned to her partner and said, "I wouldn't like to be up there in one of those!"
Her partner replied, "I wouldn't like to be up there without one."
A blond farmer had a donkey had refused to go under a bridge, and when she measured the donkey and the bridge, found that the donkey was 6 inches too tall to go under.
She got a hammer and chisel, and was cutting two grooves for the donkey's ears when a passer-by suggested she dig a groove in the ground for the donkey's feet.
"Don't be so daft," she said, "it's his ears that's too long, not his legs."
ID: 6938
Blond
It was Arbor Day, and a blonde, a brunette and a redhead all planted something.
The redhead planted flowers in her front yard.
The brunette planted a tree in her back yard.
The blonde didn't know what to plant, so she asked the redhead.
"Plant something that looks good," she said.
The blonde still didn't know what to plant, so she asked the brunette.
"Plant something you want more of," she said.
The blonde finally knew what to plant. The next day,her husband was declared a missing person.
ID: 10401
Blond
Blond College Exam
HINT: this is an exam
1.Spell yes
2.spell no
3. what is 0-0 ANSWER:0
4. answer yes to this question
5. are you human
6. what did you answer #4 HINT: #=number
7. what number is this
8. is this an exam a):yes b);yes
9. spell your name
10. leave this one blank
11. write an aswser
12. check your email
13. repeat
14.eat.
15. turn in paper
REQUIREMENTS:Do #15 all others might be wrong
IF YOU MET THE REQUIREMENTS, YOU NOW HAVE A SCHOLARSHIP TO HARVORD FOR (4) BLONDS
ANSWERS
1. yes
2. no
3. 0
4. yes
5. yes
6. yes
7. 7
8. circle
9. sexy
10.
11. 9
12 he likes me
13. he doesn't
14. eggs
15.
15.
15.HEY BLONDY GO DIE
NOTE: noone has ever passed test
ID: 2627
Blond
When the surgeon came to see his blonde patient on the day after her operation, she asked him somewhat hesitantly just how long it would be before she could resume her sex life.
"Uh, I hadn't really thought about it," admitted the stunned surgeon. You're the first one ever to ask that after a tonsillectomy.
ID: 2307
Blond
A blond got a new job cutting down trees. On the first day her boss handed her a chainsaw and said,
"Now you have to go into that forest and cut down as many trees as possible using that chain saw. Please be careful with it and also please remember that the minimum is 6 trees a day."
The blonde went into the forest and cut down trees but at the end of the day she had only managed to cut down 4.
Her boss decided to give another chance but the next day she only managed 3. He decided to give her one last chance but on the third day she only cut two trees.
When she finished work, he called the blond over and took her back into the forest.
"Right,"he said,"You must be doing something wrong here so watch how I do it, then I'll give you one more chance before you're fired.
So he stood in front of the tree and started up the chainsaw. The blond looked around suddenly and said,
"What's that noise?"
ID: 9932
Blond
1 Why cant blondes make ice cubes?
Because they dont have the recipe!
2 Two Blondes were in a car and came to a fork in a road, and the sign said Disneyland left.
So they turned around and went home.
3 How do you know when a blonde's been sending e-mail?
Envelopes in the disk drive.
4 How do you confuse a blonde?
Tell her a blonde joke.
5 Why don't Blondes make good cattle ranchers?
They can't keep their calves together.
ID: 1008
Blond
How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None, blondes usually screw in cars!
+10,000 Jokes