ID: 14185
Blond
Did you hear about the blonde who went shopping for lip-gloss just so she could pass the make-up exam?
ID: 6658
Blond
A blonde walks into a pharmacy and asks the assistant for some rectum deodorant. The pharmacist, a little bemused, explains to the woman they don't sell rectum deodorant, and never have. Unfazed, the blonde assures the pharmacist that she has been buying the stuff from his store on a regular basis and would like some more.
"I'm sorry," says the pharmacist, "we don't have any."
"But I always buy it here." says the blonde.
"Do you have the container that it came in?" asks the pharmacist.
"YES," said the blonde, "I'll go home and get it."
She returns with the container and hands it to the pharmacist who looks at it and says to her, "This is just a normal stick of underarm deodorant"
Annoyed, the blonde snatches the container back and reads out loud from the container...
"TO APPLY, PUSH UP BOTTOM."
ID: 8903
Blond
What to a blonde is long and hard?
4th Grade
ID: 6654
Blond
Q: What does a blonde do when it gets cold?
A: Sits around a candle
Q: What does she do when it gets really cold?
A: Lights it
ID: 11310
Blond
What do you say to a blonde who looks stupid in her ear muffs?
Anything you want! She cant hear you!
P.S. no offence to blondes!
ID: 6581
Blond
A blonde was at an airport. She was excited, as this would be her very first time riding in a plane; she was flying to see her relatives, so she was at the airport, when she realized she had to buy a ticket.
So she goes up to the counter where they are selling tickets. She says to the clerk, "Yes, I'd like 1 ticket to New Jersey, please."
The clerk looks at her and says, "One-way, or round trip?"
The blonde replies, "One way."
So she buys her ticket, and hurries off. A little later, though, she comes right back to the same clerk. She says, "Yes, I'd like 1 ticket to New Jersey, one way, please."
The clerk looks at her strangely, but still hands her another ticket.
She hurries off, and yet again comes back to the desk to buy another ticket.
"Yes, I'd li---"
She was interrupted by the clerk, who was obviously fed up by now. She yelled at the blonde, "WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM? YOU KEEP COMING BACK FOR MORE AND MORE TICKETS! WHY?"
The blonde replies, "I... don't .. know..!" She breaks out in tears, then continues her sentence, "This stupid guy keeps coming up to me and ripping my ticket in half!"
ID: 6784
Blond
What does a blonde do when her computer freezes?
She sticks it in the microwave.
ID: 1699
Blond
One day, a blonde and a brunette were talking on the phone. Then the brunette says, " I have to go get a new mouse for the computer. My mouse isn't running good." Since the blonde hates mice. she goes over to her computer and opens it up, looking for a running mouse. She runs back to the phone and says, " But my computer works fine without a mouse"; but since she took so long looking for the mouse, her friend hung up and the phone battery was dying out so it sounded like a squeeky assuming and it was the mouse she searched her whole house finding not one mouse. Then she calls her brunette on the phone saying I can't find one mouse in my house what does it look like? After she finished describing it the blonde finds it, then she squishes it saying, " There, it is dead! "
ID: 149
Blond
Why did the first blonde president move out of the oval office?
She couldn't find a corner to put her stuff in.
+10,000 Jokes