ID: 5022
Blond
Q: How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: "What's a lightbulb?"
ID: 4109
Blond
A girl was visiting her blonde friend who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were.
The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex.
Her friend asked, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?"
"HellOOOooo," answered the blonde. "They're watch dogs."
ID: 18101
Blond
A brunette, a redhead and a blonde all apply for the same job. The manager says, "I can only hire one of you so I'm going to ask you each a question and whoever answers it correctly gets the job." He takes the brunette into the room and asks her, "How many D's in Indiana Jones?" She replies, "One."
He brings the redhead into the room and asks her the same question. She thinks for a moment and says, "One."
He then brings the blonde into the room and asks her the same question; "How many D's in Indiana Jones?"
She thinks for a little. She counts on her fingers, counts on her toes, wiggles her ears, sticks out her tongue and finally comes up with, "Thirty Six."
The rest of them ask her, "How the hell did you come up with thirty six?!"
She replies with a smile on her face, "Da da da da, da da da." (Sing the Indiana Jones theme song)
ID: 183
Blond
How does santa greet the three blonde sisters?
Ho. Ho. Ho.
ID: 6391
Blond
Q: How did the blonde die drinking milk?
A: The cow fell on her.
ID: 598
Blond
A blonde is speeding down a deserted street when she is pulled over by a police officer.
The officer very politely requests to see the blondes license.
The blonde very indignant replies, "You know what? I'm getting tired of you cops. You just can't make up your mind. Last week you took away my license, and now you want me to show it to you?"
ID: 545
Blond
What do you call a blonde behind a steering wheel?
An Air-Bag
ID: 4563
Blond
There were four blondes sitting on the bank of a river, each with a fishing pole intently concentrating on the task at hand.
A Game Warden drove by and saw the four women fishing and decided to check for the proper fishing licenses and equipment.
He approached the women and told them he needed to check for their fishing licenses and to his surprise, they all replied they did not have one.
However, before the Warden could speak, one of the women spoke up and said, "Mr. Warden, sir, we are not fishing for you normal catch. We are environmentalist ridding the waters of garbage and other debris."
"We are not fishing for fish." said one of the others.
"We have poles, yes," another woman said, "but on the end of our lines we have magnets. The magnets are gathering up metallic debris from the bottom of this river and therefore, were are cleaning the environment."
Stunned, the Game Warden thought for a moment and then asked the women to retrieve their lines an show him the "magnets" they were using. Sure enough, one after the other, the women showed the Warden various sized and colored magnets at the end of their line.
Puzzled, the Warden again thought for a moment then stated, "Well, you ladies seem to be doing a good thing here and there is no law against cleaning up a river bed with a magnet. More people should be like you four. Have a nice day."
With that the Warden drove off. As soon as the the Warden was out of sight, the four women burst out in hysterical laughter.
Finally, when one of them was able to speak, she said, "Stupid Fish Cop! Doesn't he know there are steelheads in this river?!?!"
ID: 2307
Blond
A blond got a new job cutting down trees. On the first day her boss handed her a chainsaw and said,
"Now you have to go into that forest and cut down as many trees as possible using that chain saw. Please be careful with it and also please remember that the minimum is 6 trees a day."
The blonde went into the forest and cut down trees but at the end of the day she had only managed to cut down 4.
Her boss decided to give another chance but the next day she only managed 3. He decided to give her one last chance but on the third day she only cut two trees.
When she finished work, he called the blond over and took her back into the forest.
"Right,"he said,"You must be doing something wrong here so watch how I do it, then I'll give you one more chance before you're fired.
So he stood in front of the tree and started up the chainsaw. The blond looked around suddenly and said,
"What's that noise?"
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