ID: 249
Blond
A blonde walked in a library and went to the librarian, pulls out a thick book and started screaming at her.
She yells, "THIS BOOK IS HORRIBLE! THERE ARE TOO MANY CHARACTERS AND NO PLOT WHATSOEVER!"
The librarian stares at her, then calmly replies, "So you're the one who took our phone book."
ID: 9935
Blond
1 Why did the blonde cross the road?
She was tied to the baby that was stapled to the chicken.
2 Why did the blonde take a right into the ditch?
Her blinker was on
3 What is it called when a blonde blows in another blonde's ear ?
Data transfer.
4 What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you?
Pull the pin and throw it back.
ID: 5270
Blond
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all go to a bar.
The redhead walks up to the bartender and says,"I'll have a BL." So the bartender gives her a Bud Light.
The brunette walks up next and says,"I'll have an ML." So the bartender gives her a Miller Light.
The blonde is catchingon so she goes up to the bartender and says,"I'll have a 15."
The bartender thinks about it, looks around, and says,"Ok, you stumped me. What's a 15?"
The blonde goes,"Duh! 7 and 7."
ID: 505
Blond
A man was mowing his front yard when his attractive, blonde, female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to her mailbox. She opened the mailbox, looked inside, slammed it shut, and stormed back into her house. A little later, she came out of her house again, went to the mailbox, again opened it, and again slammed it shut. Angrily back into the house she went.
As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, the blonde came out again. She marched to the mailbox, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever.
Puzzled by her actions, the man asked her, "Is something wrong?"
She replied, "There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps telling me I have mail!"
ID: 1764
Blond
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are all in a red ferari speeding down a country road being chased by a squad car.
They try to lose him by darting into a forest behind a farm.
The trio ditch the car and decide to each hide in three burlap sacs on the ground.
The cop who was really close on their tail went up to each sac.
The cop kicked the first sac and the brunette inside said;
"Woof woof"
"Oh it's just a dog."
Then he kicked the second sac,
Inside that sack the redhead said;
"Meow Meow"
"Oh, it's just a kitten.
Then the cop went up to the third sac with the blonde inside and kicked it
The blonde said
"Potato potato"
ID: 291
Blond
Three men, two brunettes and a blond, are being chased by a tiger through the jungle. They get to a river and have two choices: 1. Get across the river without being eaten by pirannhas or 2. Get eaten by the tiger.
They spot a genie and the genie says I can grant you one wish..
The first blond man thinks "I wish I can get across safely." He swims across and makes it without a scratch.
The second blond man says "I want to be even smarter than the first man." He climbed onto a raft and paddled across.
The brunette thinks "I want to be the smartest of them all". Instantly, he turned into a woman, and she walked across a nearby bridge.
ID: 4051
Blond
What does a blond say when she is watching a porn movie?
ANSWER: "Look, me!"
ID: 145
Blond
Why should you never ask a blonde to make ice cubes for you?
She'll never remember the recipe.
ID: 24
Blond
An Essex girl walks into the local dry cleaners. She places a garment on the counter.
"I'll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress," she says.
"Come again?" says the clerk, cupping his ear.
"No" she replies. "This time it's mayonnaise."
+10,000 Jokes