ID: 14015
Blond
One day a blonde and her boyfriend went to a car store. He asks her what car she wants but she says, "I dunno."
So he takes her around to all the car shops and she says, "I want the BMW."
He asks her why she wants a BMW and she says, "Because I dunno how to spell the other brands!"
ID: 5426
Blond
Q: How can you tell if a blonde has stolen your bike?
A: She's running away with it under her arm.
ID: 3152
Blond
Two bosses were talking about how dumb their blond assistants are. The first boss says, "You think your assistant is dumb, watch this." And the man calls over the blond and says "Go to my house and see if I'm home." So the blond says "Yes sir! Right away sir!" and away she goes.
The second boss says "You call that dumb! Watch this!" So he calls over his blonde assistant and says "Here's a dime, go buy me a car." She replies "Yes sir! No problem!" and away the blond goes.
On their way to go do the tasks given to them, they meet up and start talking.
The first blond says "My boss is so stupid! He told me to go to his house and see if he's home. I mean, why couldn't he just call and see if he's home! OH! The nerve!"
The second blond says "You think that's dumb? My boss gave me a dime to go buy him a car! Honestly! He didn't even tell me what kind or color he wanted!"
ID: 667
Blond
Why do blondes climb chain-link fences?
To see what's on the other side.
ID: 789
Blond
A blonde was walking past a schoolyard during recess when she saw a young girl standing all alone on one end of the soccer field, while the other children all played a game of soccer. Feeling sorry for the poor child, she went up to the girl and made small talk.
She asked the little girl if she was OK.
The little girl replied she was fine.
The blonde then said, "Why don't you go play with the other children?"
The little girl replied, "I already am."
The blonde, a bit annoyed said, "What do you mean, you already am?"
The girl replied, "I am playing."
The blonde, thinking the girl was lying so she wouldnt be embarassed, said, "Wanna be friends?"
The girl hesitated, then reluctantly said Sure.
The blonde, feeling she made progress, says, "Would you like to go play in the sandbox?"
The girl replies, "Sure... after I'm done playing soccer. I'm the goalie."
ID: 1668
Blond
Q: How can you tell when a blonde has been driving your car?
A: There is lipstick on the steering wheel from her blowing the horn.
ID: 2781
Blond
Why did the blonde run out of shampoo?
She kept following the instructions: lather, rinse, repeat!
ID: 2444
Blond
A blonde decided to commit suicide by hanging herself from a tree in the park.
A few days later, a man was walking his dog and spotted her hanging from the tree. He asks the blonde what she is doing and she replies, "I'm hanging myself."
"You're supposed to put the noose around your neck, not your waist," said the onlooker. "I tried that," replied the blonde, "but I couldn't breathe."
ID: 2314
Blond
How many blondes does it takes to screw in a lightbulb?
three:
one to unscrew it
one to buy a new lightbulb
one to call her boyfriend to screw it back in.
+10,000 Jokes