ID: 15749
Blond
A redhead, brunette and a blonde went to the doctor. As they sat in the waiting room, the redhead got bored and went to the small fishbowl in the middle of the room where a goldfish swam around happily.
The redhead stared at the goldfish and the fish also stared back. After 1 minute, the redhead tilted her head to the left and the fish swam in that direction. She tilted her head to the right and the fish also swam to the right.
The brunette saw this trick, was impressed and asked the redhead how she did it. "Easy", replied the redhead. "It's just mind over matter."
So the brunette stared at the fish and the fish also stared back. After 3 minutes, the brunette tilted her head to the left and the fish swam in that direction. She tilted her head to the right and the fish also swam to the right.
The blonde, seeing this trick, was also impressed and asked the brunette how she did it. "Easy", replied the brunette. "It's just mind over matter."
So, the blonde stared at the fish and the fish also stared back. One minute... Three minutes... Five minutes... After five minutes, the blonde began to open and close her mouth repeatedly.
ID: 4905
Blond
Q: Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet?
A: So she wouldn't wake up the sleeping pills.
ID: 1286
Blond
Q: Why did the blonde have bruises around her bellybutton?
A: Because her boyfriend was blond too!
ID: 41
Blond
How can you tell if a blonde woman has been dating?
By the belt buckle imprint on her forehead.
ID: 615
Blond
Why do blondes hate making Kool-aid?
They can't fit the 8 cups of water in the
envelope!
ID: 423
Blond
A blonde hurries into the emergency room late one night with the tip of her index finger shot off.
"How did this happen?" the emergency room doctor asked her.
"Well, I was trying to commit suicide," the blonde replied.
"What?" sputtered the doctor. "You tried to commit suicide by shooting your finger off?"
"No, Silly!" the blonde said. "First I put the gun to my chest, and I thought: I just paid $6,000.00 for these breast implants, I'm not shooting myself in the chest."
"So then?" asked the doctor.
"Then I put the gun in my mouth, and I thought: I just paid $3000.00 to get my teeth straightened, I'm not shooting myself in the mouth."
"So then?"
"Then I put the gun to my ear, and I thought: This is going to make a loud noise. So I put my finger in the other ear before I pulled the trigger."
ID: 935
Blond
A dumb blonde, a smart blonde, and Santa Claus were invited to a party.
On the way, the dumb blonde's car broke down. The smart blonde missed the bus. Two of Santa Claus' reindeer ran away.
Who got to the party first?
The dumb blonde, because the other two don't exist!
ID: 1009
Blond
What do railroad tracks and blondes have in common?
They are both laid all over America!
ID: 143
Blond
2 blondes are walking in the park and the 1st blonde says, "LOOK! Dead bird!"
The 2nd blonde looks up into the sky and yells "Where?!"
+10,000 Jokes