ID: 14128
Blond
The Sheriff in a small town walks out in the street and sees a blond cowboy coming down the walk with nothing on but his cowboy hat, gun and his boots So the sheriff arrests him for indecent exposure. As he is locking him up he asks, "Why in the world are you dressed like this?"
Cowboy: "Well, it's like this, Sheriff. I was in the bar down the road and this pretty little redhead asks me to go out to her motor home with her, and I did.
We go inside and she pulls off her top and asks me to pull off my shirt, so I did.
Then she pulls off her skirt and asks me to pull off my pants, so I did.
Then she pulls off her panties and asks me to pull off my shorts, so I did.
Then she gets on the bed and looks at me kind of funny and says, "Now go to town cowboy...."
ID: 8429
Blond
How do you keep a blond busy?
Write "please turn over" on both sides of a paper!
ID: 185
Blond
If you're on a plane going to California and you're stuck in an aisle seat how do you trick a blonde into giving you her window seat?
Tell her only the aisle seats are going to California.
ID: 7955
Blond
Fred was getting out of his car to go to an electronics store and had his dog in the car with him. "Stay," said Fred.
A blond was witnessing all this and said to Fred, "Would it just be easier to put it in park?"
ID: 8903
Blond
What to a blonde is long and hard?
4th Grade
ID: 984
Blond
A trucker has just turned a corner on a deserted roadway and was proceeding to change lanes when a blonde in a speedy corvette cut right in front of him almost making him get run off the road. Enraged the trucker sped up and overtook the blonde then forced her to slow down. When the blonde finally stopped the trucker stepped out of his truck, went over the to corvette and yanked the blonde out.
He then drew a circle with a piece of chalk he had around the blonde.
"If you step outside of this circle, I will kill you. You hear? You just stay right there missy," said the Trucker.
The trucker went to his truck and grabbed a wooden bat. He smashed the corvettes windows in and knocked off the rear-view mirror. Then he stops and hears a tiny giggle. He turns around and the blonde is trying not to laugh.
He turns back to work and stabs the tires with his swiss army knife, then smashes in the car windows. Then he hears a snicker from behind him. He turns around and the blonde is red from trying to hold in a laugh. Getting angry the trucker proceeds to smash the taillights, and dent the hell out of the cars body. Wanting to completely obliterate the car, he went into his semi-truck and ran over the car crushing it into a flattened piece of metal.
As he gets out to admire his demolition work, he sees the blonde on the ground laughing like a madwoman and rolling around holding her sides.
He goes and grabs the blonde by her hair and yells in her face, "WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING YOU FOOL??"
The blonde tries to put on a straight face and says, "While you were looking away, I stepped out of the circle 3 TIMES!"
ID: 5149
Blond
An airline captain was breaking in a very pretty new blonde stewardess. The route they were flying had a stay-over in another city, so upon their arrival, the captain showed the stewardess the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight.
The next morning as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day's route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up wondering what happened to her. She answered the phone, sobbing, and said she couldn't get out of her room.
"You can't get out of your room?" the captaind asked, "Why not?"
The stewardess replied, "There are only three doors in here," she cried, "one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that says "Do Not Disturb"!!
ID: 5362
Blond
Q: Why do blondes drive VWs ?
A: Because they can't spell PORSCHE
ID: 3767
Blond
There were two blondes who went deep into the woods searching for a Christmas tree.
After hours of subzero temperatures and a few close calls with hungry wolves, one blonde turned to the other and said, "I'm chopping down the next tree I see. I don't care whether it's decorated or not!"
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