ID: 16400
Blond
A man walks into a bar and sits down next to a beautiful blonde.
"I just got this amazing watch," he tells her, "it can reads alpha waves, and can tell me what a person is thinking."
"What does it say about me?" asked the blonde.
"It says you want to sleep with me," said the man.
"Sorry," said the blonde, "I think your watch is broken."
"Hmmm," said the man, slowly examining the watch, "It seems to be running an hour fast..."
ID: 7735
Blond
Q: Why is it okay for blondes to catch a cold?
A: No need for them to worry about blowing their brains out.
ID: 148
Blond
How do you get a blonde to marry you?
Tell her she's pregnant.
What will be her response?
"Is it mine?"
ID: 2844
Blond
Did you hear about the blond who tried to hijack a submarine?
She demanded $100,000 and a parachute.
ID: 10902
Blond
A flying saucer landed at a gas station on a lonely country road. The two space aliens inside seemed completely unconcerned about detection; in fact, the letters "UFO" were emblazoned in big, bold letters on one side of their shiny craft. As the station owner stood and gawked in silence, paralyzed with
shock, his young, blonde attendant nonchalantly filled up the tank and then waved to the two aliens as they took off. "Do you realize what just happened?" the station owner finally
uttered. "Yeah," said the blonde attendant. "So?"
"Didn't you see the space aliens in that vehicle?!"
"Yeah," repeated the blonde. "So?" "Didn't you see the letters 'UFO' on the side of that vehicle?!" "Yeah," repeated the blonde attendant. "So?" "Don't you know what 'UFO' means?!" The blonde attendant rolled her eyes. "Good grief, boss! I've been working here for five years. Of course I know what 'UFO' means - it means 'Unleaded Fuel Only'.
ID: 1087
Blond
A Blonde is getting on an elevator and meets a gentleman on
board.
"T.G.I.F." she says.
"S.H.I.T" was his reply.
Puzzled she replied "T.G.I.F"
The gentleman was getting a little disturbed the the remark, so
he says again. "S.H.I.T.".
The Blonde leans over and whispers "THANK GOD IT'S FRIDAY".
The gentleman responses with "SORRY, HONEY IT'S THURSDAY".
ID: 9303
Blond
What did the blonde say to the red head?
Nothing. She couldn't remember what she was going to say!
ID: 5252
Blond
Have you heard about the new blonde paint? It's not too bright but it spreads real easy.
ID: 9209
Blond
Once, there was a blonde who called her boyfriend and said, "Baby, I'm working on this puzzle and it's really hard. Can you come and help me?" He asked what it looked like and she replied saying that there was a tiger on the box. The boyfriend was convinced to come over and help. She welcomed him at the door and showed him the mess of pieces on her coffee table. After observing the peices, the boyfriend said, "Okay, sweetie, let's sit down, relax, have some coffee, then can we please put the frosted flakes back in the box?"
+10,000 Jokes