ID: 9427
Blond
A blonde and a brunette are walking along the sidewalk, and the brunette says she is dying of thirst and wants Dr. Pepper. The blonde runs across town into the nearest hospital and asks the receptionist for Dr. Pepper. The receptionist says OK, and hands her a bottle of soda. The blonde says, "What do you think this is? A Joke? My friend is dying and needs to see Dr. Pepper right away!!!"
ID: 17558
Blond
Q: How do you keep an idiot busy?
A: Have him read this.
ID: 8191
Blond
A blond goes up to a brunette that's wearing a puffy wig with two green ribbons on each front side.
The blond says "NICE CAT! HOW DID YOU GET IT TO BALANCE ON YOUR HEAD?"
The brunette tears up and says "ITS A WIG! MY FRIENDS TOLD ME IT WAS IN FASHION AND I GUESS THEY HATE ME!!!"
The brunette runs home and never noticed that she was talking to a blond. So in the end the brunette was a blond too.
ID: 10522
Blond
1 Why don't blondes eat bananas?
They can't find the zipper.
2 Why don't blondes use vibrators?
They chip their teeth.
3 Why don't blondes in San Francisco wear short black mini skirts?
Cause their balls show.
4 Why don't a blondes eyes fall out of her when she stands?
The vacuum in her head keeps them in place.
5 What does a blonde answer to the question "Are you sexually active?"
"No, I just lie there."
ID: 10076
Blond
1 Why did God create brunettes?
So ugly men wouldn't feel left out
2 Why do brunettes like their dark hair color?
It doesn't show the dirt
3 Why are brunettes so proud of their hair?
It matches their mustache.
4 What do brunettes miss most about a great party?
The invitation.
5 What do you call a good-looking man with a brunette?
Gay, married, or a hostage.
ID: 10983
Blond
One day a man is up on his soap box telling blonde jokes. A large crowd has gathered around him and are laughing hysterically at every line, most of which he probably took off of this website. A blonde walks up to him and starts yelling at him, "You know, not all blondes are as dumb as you make us out to be."
Taken aback by this he says, "Fine. If you can answer three questions, I'll pack it up and never tell another blonde joke." She agrees and he starts the questioning.
"Ok, I'll give you an easy one first. What are the colors of the flag of the United States of America?"
"That's easy," she replies, "Red, white, and blue."
"Not bad, I've had some blondes screw that one up. OK, next question. Who wrote the play 'A Midsummer Night's Dream'?"
"At this rate you better start packing up and leaving. That is by William Shakespeare," she retorts
"Impressive. Ok, third and final question. How many D's are in Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer?" The blonde scratches her chin, thinking deep about the question, and asks, "Can I come back to you on this one?" "Sure," as the man snickers, "Come on back." She runs off as the crowd laughs and the man continues telling jokes.
About fifteen minutes later she comes running back, out of breath yelling, "Sixty-five!" The man looks at her curiously and asks, "How did you come to that?!?!?"
She catches her breath and starts (to the tune of 'rudolph the red-nosed reindeer), "de de de de de de de,,,,"
ID: 9958
Blond
1 What's the advantage of having a blonde as a girlfriend?
You get to park in handicapped zones.
2 What do you call a blonde in a leather jacket?
A rebel without a clue.
3 Why did God give blondes 2% more brains than horses?
So they don't crap on the street during parades!
ID: 6784
Blond
What does a blonde do when her computer freezes?
She sticks it in the microwave.
ID: 7734
Blond
Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a computer?
A: You only have to punch information into a computer once.
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