ID: 4838
Blond
A blonde walked into the pet store and, after looking up and down the aisles, asked the sales clerk for help.
"I'd like a box of birdseed," said the lady.
"For which kind of bird?" he asked helpfully.
"Oh, I dunno," she replied. "Whichever will grow the fastest."
ID: 16292
Blond
BLONDE #1: I found some jokes about us blondes online. They're inaccurate! They make us look-
BLONDE #2:Ugly?
BLONDE #3:Fat?
BLONDE #4:Lazy?
BLONDE #5:Mean?
BLONDE #1:No, stupidly funny.
ID: 4563
Blond
There were four blondes sitting on the bank of a river, each with a fishing pole intently concentrating on the task at hand.
A Game Warden drove by and saw the four women fishing and decided to check for the proper fishing licenses and equipment.
He approached the women and told them he needed to check for their fishing licenses and to his surprise, they all replied they did not have one.
However, before the Warden could speak, one of the women spoke up and said, "Mr. Warden, sir, we are not fishing for you normal catch. We are environmentalist ridding the waters of garbage and other debris."
"We are not fishing for fish." said one of the others.
"We have poles, yes," another woman said, "but on the end of our lines we have magnets. The magnets are gathering up metallic debris from the bottom of this river and therefore, were are cleaning the environment."
Stunned, the Game Warden thought for a moment and then asked the women to retrieve their lines an show him the "magnets" they were using. Sure enough, one after the other, the women showed the Warden various sized and colored magnets at the end of their line.
Puzzled, the Warden again thought for a moment then stated, "Well, you ladies seem to be doing a good thing here and there is no law against cleaning up a river bed with a magnet. More people should be like you four. Have a nice day."
With that the Warden drove off. As soon as the the Warden was out of sight, the four women burst out in hysterical laughter.
Finally, when one of them was able to speak, she said, "Stupid Fish Cop! Doesn't he know there are steelheads in this river?!?!"
ID: 4410
Blond
Q: Why did the blonde wear condoms on her ears?
A: She was afraid she might get hearing aids.
ID: 1008
Blond
How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None, blondes usually screw in cars!
ID: 5270
Blond
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all go to a bar.
The redhead walks up to the bartender and says,"I'll have a BL." So the bartender gives her a Bud Light.
The brunette walks up next and says,"I'll have an ML." So the bartender gives her a Miller Light.
The blonde is catchingon so she goes up to the bartender and says,"I'll have a 15."
The bartender thinks about it, looks around, and says,"Ok, you stumped me. What's a 15?"
The blonde goes,"Duh! 7 and 7."
ID: 872
Blond
What two things in the air can make a blonde pregnant?
Her Legs
ID: 666
Blond
There are 99 Blonds on a plane and 1 Brunette. The captain radios in that they are going down, So they drop all the luggage. They were still going down so they drop out all the chairs. They were still going down so they dropped the floor. So they are hanging by their hands from the top on the plane with no floor. So the captain say's "1 person jump out" the Brunette say's "I'll sacrifice my life", and all the Blonds start clapping.
ID: 1188
Blond
A blond guy and a brunette girl were happily married and about to have a baby. One day, the wife started having contractions, so the husband rushed her to the hospital. He held her hand as she went through a trying birth, and in the end, there were two little baby boys.
The blond guy turned to his wife and angrily said, "All right, who's the other father?"
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