ID: 429
Blond
Two blondes realize that their apartment is on fire and go out onto the balcony.
"Help, help!" yelled one of the blondes.
"Help us, help us!" yelled the other.
"Maybe it would help if we yelled together," said the first blonde.
"Good idea," said the other.
"Together, together!" they yelled.
ID: 11370
Blond
She sent me a fax with a stamp on it.
-She tripped over the cordless phone.
-She put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind.
-She took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
-At the bottom of the application where is says "Sign here", she wrote Sagittarius.
-If she spoke her mind, she'd be speechless.
-When she heard that 90% of all crimes were around the home, she moved.
-She got an AM radio. It took her 9 months to figure out that she could use it at night.
-She stood staring at the frozen orange juice because it said "Concentrate".
ID: 355
Blond
How do a blond's braincells die?
Alone.
ID: 467
Blond
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead show up for the same job interview. The brunette is the first one to go in, and after filling out the forms and going through the questions, the interviewer decides to ask her last question:
"How many D's are there in "INDIANA JONES?"
The brunette thinks for a second and responds "One."
The interviewer sends her back with a promise that he'll get back to her after he had interviewed the remaining candidates.
The redhead is next. The process goes about the same, and at the end: "How many D's are there in INDIANA JONES?"
She immediately says "One." The interviewer says, "OK, we'll let you know."
Then the blonde comes into the room, goes through the questions, and finally gets asked: "How many D's are there in INDIANA JONES?"
She gets a very serious look on her face and starts counting her fingers, muttering: "2, 4, 6 ...., hmmm � wait,... 2, 4, 6 .... can I borrow your calculator please?"
After going through 15 minutes of intense calculating, she finally comes up with the answer: "Thirty two"
The interviewer is stunned and asks her: "Ok, now tell me, how the hell did you arrive at this answer?"
"Simple... Daaaa da da daaaa daaaa da daaaa... Daaaa da da daaa daa da daaaa da da... sing along now you remember it"
ID: 42
Blond
What does a blonde say when she loses her virginity?
"So are you guys all on the same team?"
ID: 141
Blond
Blonde inventions:
Waterproof towel
Unbreakable egg
Submarine screen door
Solar powered flash light
Helicopter ejection seat
Inflatable dart board
Pedal powered wheel chairs
ID: 3655
Blond
Two blondes were starting a round of golf together. On the first tee, the first blonde smacked a beautiful drive down the center of the fairway. With a smile, she picked up the tee and walked to the cart.
The second blonde cranked another good drive down the center of the fairway. Pleased, she hopped in the cart.
When they arrived at the golf balls, they noticed that they were ten yards apart.
"That's mine up there," said the first blonde, pointing to the ball closer to the green.
"No way, I outdrove you easily," said the second blonde. Before you know it, fists were flying.
After a brief scuffle, the second blonde stopped and said, "I know how we can solve this problem!"
"How?"
"We will get the clubhouse pro out here!"
Sure enough, they drove back to the clubhouse and got him and dragged him out to the fairway.
Studying the situation for a few minutes the pro finally said, "I know how to solve this!"
"How?"
"Yeah, how?"
Replied the pro, "Who is hitting the yellow ball?"
ID: 4411
Blond
Q:What did the blonde's right leg say to her left leg?
A:Nothing, they haven't met yet.
ID: 4043
Blond
How does a blond turn the light on after sex?
ANSWER: She opens the car door.
+10,000 Jokes