ID: 16110
Blond
A blonde named Megan decides to go out for a ride in her new convertible. While she's out driving she sees her best friend Christina, another blonde. She has a sign that reads "Vegas or Bust." "Why are you leaving?" asked Megan. "Some guy came up to me and told me to get out of town." "Come with me. We'll go find the guy that said this and find out what's up." Christina got in the car and they drove until Christina said she saw the guy who told her to leave town.
As they approached him, he looked at Christina and said, "I remember you." She cowered behind Megan. "You forgot your flier." He handed her a flier that read "Get Outta Town! To Sunny Beach Resorts California!"
ID: 4051
Blond
What does a blond say when she is watching a porn movie?
ANSWER: "Look, me!"
ID: 112
Blond
A blonde walks into the police department looking for a job. The officer wants to ask her a few questions....
Officer: What's 2+2?
Blonde: Ummmmm... 4!
Officer: What's the square root of 100?
Blonde: Ummmm... 10!
Officer: Good! Now, who killed Abraham Lincoln?
Blonde: Ummmm... I dunno.
Officer: Well, you can go home and think about it. Come back tomorrow.
The blonde goes home and calls up one of her friends, who asks her if she got the job. The blonde says, excitedly, "Not only did I get the job, I'm already working on a murder case!"
ID: 534
Blond
Q. Why do young blondes carry goldfish in their
pockets?
A. So they can smell like old blondes.
ID: 1937
Blond
How do you get a one-armed blonde out of a tree?
Wave!
ID: 24
Blond
An Essex girl walks into the local dry cleaners. She places a garment on the counter.
"I'll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress," she says.
"Come again?" says the clerk, cupping his ear.
"No" she replies. "This time it's mayonnaise."
ID: 4873
Blond
Two blondes were going on a hike, and came to a fork in the road. A sign was in the center that said "Bear left." One of the blondes said,"I'm happy that was taken care of, now we finally are able to take the upper trail," so they proceeded left.
ID: 151
Blond
Why did the blonde steal a parked police car?
She saw "911" and thought it was a Porsche. (Porsche 911)
ID: 586
Blond
A blonde is walking down the street with her blouse open, exposing one of her breasts.
A nearby policeman approaches her and remarks, "Ma'am, are you aware that I could cite you for indecent exposure?"
"Why, officer?" asks the blonde.
"Because your blouse is open and your breast is exposed."
"Oh my goodness," exclaims the blonde, "I left my baby on the bus!"