ID: 142
Blond
What do you call the skeleton of a blonde you find in a closet?
1950's Hide-n-seek champion.
ID: 16987
Blond
There was a blonde in Wal-mart and she went up to a man.
The blonde said, "Hi! Do you know what IDK means?"
The man said, "I don't know."
Then the blonde said, "DARN! Nobody knows!"
ID: 10193
Blond
Q. How can you tell if a blonde has been using your computer?
A. The joystick is wet.
Q. Why do blondes wear underwear?
A. To keep their ankles warm.
Q. What is a brunette between two blondes?
A. An interpreter.
Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a brick?
A. The brick doesn't follow you home after you lay it.
Q. Did you hear about the blonde that needed gas money?
A. She sold her car for it..
Q. What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
A. "Are you sure it's mine?"
Q. Why do blondes have bruised belly buttons?
A. Because they have blond boyfriends.
ID: 11643
Blond
A blonde and her husband go to buy her new clothes. First, they decide she needs a new shirt, so they go through a few shirts but she rejects them all. Finally she points at one that she likes, but he thinks it is ugly, so he says no. They go through almost the whole store, and she says no to all of the shirts. Bored and annoyed, the husband finally goes up to the shirt she likes and generously "Fine, do you want this polo shirt?" The wife thinks for a few seconds and says "Oh, it's a polo shirt? In that case no, I'm really not into sports."
ID: 11364
Blond
Q: Why do blondes insist on guys wearing condoms?
A: So they'll have a doggie bag for later.
Q: What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
A: "Are you sure it's mine?"
Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a walrus?
A: One has whiskers and fishy flaps, the other is a walrus
Q: What does a blonde say after she graduates from college?
A: "Hi, welcome to McDonalds."
Q: What do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet?
A: Last year's hide and seek champ.
Q: What do you call a fly buzzing inside a blonde's head?
A: A space invader.
Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain?
A: Gifted!
Q: How do blonde brain cells die?
A: Alone.
Q: Why did the blonde resolve to have only three children?
A: Because she read that one child out of every four born was Chinese.
Q: What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells?
A: Pregnant.
Q: What do you call it when a blonde dyes her hair brunette?
A: Artificial intelligence.
Q: Why should blondes not be given coffee breaks? A: It takes too long to retrain them.
Q How can you tell if a blonde's been using the computer?
A: There's Tippex on the screen.
Q: How can you tell if another blonde's been using the same computer?
A: There's writing on the Tippex.
Q: How do you make a blonde's eyes sparkle?
A: Shine a flashlight in her ear.
Q. Did you hear about the blond man who had 8 vasectomies?
A. He had to -- his wife kept getting pregnant!
Q: What do you call a blonde with pig tails?
A: A blow job with handle bars.
ID: 7046
Blond
A blonde went to her regular plastic surgion one day. When she walked in, he said to her, "What more can I do for you? I have changed your every part of your body that you could think of! I even did your ears!"
She replied, "Well, this is kind of embarrasing for me say out loud."
The plastic surgion, curious to know what the blonde wanted done, asked, "What is it? You can trust me.
She answered shyly. "This morning, while I was looking in the mirror, I noticed that my butt had a huge crack down the middle and i was wondering if you could get me a new one that isn't broken."
ID: 7055
Blond
A man is driving down a country road, when he spots a male farmer standing in the middle of a huge field of grass. Of course the farmer is a blond. :)
He pulls the car over to the side of the road and notices that the farmer is just standing there, doing nothing, looking at nothing.
The man gets out of the car, walks all the way out to the farmer and asks him, "Er... excuse me mister, but what are you doing?"
The farmer replies, "I'm trying to win a Nobel Prize."
"How?" asks the man, puzzled.
"Well, I heard they give the Nobel Prize to people who are out standing in their field!"
ID: 7495
Blond
A blonde, brunette, and a redhead all get together once a week to talk about the problems they are having with their daughters, and get input from the other two moms. So, the brunette decided to open the meeting.
"I found a pack of cigarettes on my daughter's nightstand the other night. What am I going to do?"
The moms told her to talk to her daughter and tell her it was wrong, and to never do it again.
The redhead said that she had recently found a 12 pack of beer in her daughter's closet. The moms told her to talk to her daughter, tell her it was wrong, and never to do it again.
When it was the blonde mom's turn she said:
"I found a box of condoms on my daughter's dresser the other day."
All the moms are in shock. But the blonde gets up and says, "No no, the worst part is that I didn't even know she had one of those."
ID: 10483
Blond
1 What do blondes and cow pies have in common?
The older they get, the easier they are to pick up.
2 What did the blonde do when her doctor told her she had sugar in her urine?
She peed on her corn flakes.
3 What did the blonde do when she noticed that someone had already written on the overhead transparency?
She turned it over and used the other side.
4 Did you hear about the stupid blonde?
She got hit by a parked car.
5 Why can't the blonde add 10 and 7 on a calculator?
Because she can't find the 10
+10,000 Jokes