ID: 15706
Blond
#1: When her teacher said to write an essay, she brought in a sheet of paper saying "An Essay."
#2: When she caught on fire nearby a lake, she called the fire department.
#3: She drank a bottle of root beer and said, "This doesn't taste like beer, or roots."
#4: She gave 200 dollars to a cashier for a small bag of chips and said, "Keep the change."
#5: When she heard that 1 of the 3-porta potties, each next to each other, was out of order, she walked 10 miles to the ocean.
#6: When she saw an old person she said, "At least I'm young."
#7: When she was suing someone, she thought that she was killing herself because she was on the counter sues side.
#8: When she realized someone in weaponry shed was attacking her, she called the police.
#9: When she was dying her hair, she thought she would be bald and her hair would be on the floor without a pulse.
#10: When she told this whole entire joke to her son, she realized she had low self-esteem.
ID: 10902
Blond
A flying saucer landed at a gas station on a lonely country road. The two space aliens inside seemed completely unconcerned about detection; in fact, the letters "UFO" were emblazoned in big, bold letters on one side of their shiny craft. As the station owner stood and gawked in silence, paralyzed with
shock, his young, blonde attendant nonchalantly filled up the tank and then waved to the two aliens as they took off. "Do you realize what just happened?" the station owner finally
uttered. "Yeah," said the blonde attendant. "So?"
"Didn't you see the space aliens in that vehicle?!"
"Yeah," repeated the blonde. "So?" "Didn't you see the letters 'UFO' on the side of that vehicle?!" "Yeah," repeated the blonde attendant. "So?" "Don't you know what 'UFO' means?!" The blonde attendant rolled her eyes. "Good grief, boss! I've been working here for five years. Of course I know what 'UFO' means - it means 'Unleaded Fuel Only'.
ID: 11369
Blond
Fifteen minutes into the flight from Kansas City to Toronto, the captain announced, "Ladies and gentlemen, one of our engines has failed. There is nothing to worry about. Our flight will take an hour longer than scheduled, but we still have three engines left."
Thirty minutes later the captain announced, "One more engine has failed and the flight will take an additional two hours. But don't worry, we can fly just fine on two engines."
An hour later the captain announced, "One more engine has failed and our arrival will be delayed another three hours. But don't worry, we still have one engine left."
A young blonde passenger turned to the man in the next seat and remarked, "If we lose one more engine, we'll be up here all day!"
ID: 9870
Blond
After a trial had been going on for three days, Finally, the blonde accused of committing the crimes, stood up and approached the judge's bench. "Your Honor, I would like to change my plea from 'not guilty' to 'guilty' of the charges."
The judge angrily banged his fist on the desk. "If you're guilty, why didn't you say so in the first place and save this court a lot of time and inconvenience?" he demanded.
The blonde looked up wide-eyed and stated, "Well, when the trial started I thought I was innocent, but that was before I heard all the evidence against me."
ID: 9209
Blond
Once, there was a blonde who called her boyfriend and said, "Baby, I'm working on this puzzle and it's really hard. Can you come and help me?" He asked what it looked like and she replied saying that there was a tiger on the box. The boyfriend was convinced to come over and help. She welcomed him at the door and showed him the mess of pieces on her coffee table. After observing the peices, the boyfriend said, "Okay, sweetie, let's sit down, relax, have some coffee, then can we please put the frosted flakes back in the box?"
ID: 9303
Blond
What did the blonde say to the red head?
Nothing. She couldn't remember what she was going to say!
ID: 10401
Blond
Blond College Exam
HINT: this is an exam
1.Spell yes
2.spell no
3. what is 0-0 ANSWER:0
4. answer yes to this question
5. are you human
6. what did you answer #4 HINT: #=number
7. what number is this
8. is this an exam a):yes b);yes
9. spell your name
10. leave this one blank
11. write an aswser
12. check your email
13. repeat
14.eat.
15. turn in paper
REQUIREMENTS:Do #15 all others might be wrong
IF YOU MET THE REQUIREMENTS, YOU NOW HAVE A SCHOLARSHIP TO HARVORD FOR (4) BLONDS
ANSWERS
1. yes
2. no
3. 0
4. yes
5. yes
6. yes
7. 7
8. circle
9. sexy
10.
11. 9
12 he likes me
13. he doesn't
14. eggs
15.
15.
15.HEY BLONDY GO DIE
NOTE: noone has ever passed test
ID: 8109
Blond
Q. How do you keep a blond from whistling while she is skydiving?
A. Make sure she wears underwear.
ID: 10010
Blond
Why is a blond, Blond?
Isn't it obvious? They're dumb.
+10,000 Jokes