ID: 149
Blond
Why did the first blonde president move out of the oval office?
She couldn't find a corner to put her stuff in.
ID: 16292
Blond
BLONDE #1: I found some jokes about us blondes online. They're inaccurate! They make us look-
BLONDE #2:Ugly?
BLONDE #3:Fat?
BLONDE #4:Lazy?
BLONDE #5:Mean?
BLONDE #1:No, stupidly funny.
ID: 1391
Blond
How do you turn a blonde into a brunette?
Make her do a cartwheel!
ID: 540
Blond
Why do brunettes like their dark hair color?
-It doesn't show the dirt
Who makes all the bras for brunettes?
-Fisher-Price.
Why didn't Indians scalp brunettes?
-The hair from a buffalo's butt was more manageable.
Why are most brunettes flat-chested?
-It makes it easier for them to read their T-shirts.
Why are brunettes so proud of their hair?
-It matches their mustache.
Why is the color brunette considered evil?
-When's the last time ya saw a blonde witch?
How can you tell a brunette is lonely?
-Check her for a pulse.
What is the most frustrated animal in the world?
-A brunette rabbit
What did the frustrated brunette say to her uninterested lover?
-"What part of 'yes' do you not understand?"
Why did God create brunettes?
-So ugly men wouldn't feel left out.
What do brunettes miss most about a great party?
-The invitation.
Where do brunettes get the hair for a transplant?
-From their underarms.
What do you call a good-looking man with a brunette?
-Gay, married, or a hostage.
How did Revlon come up with its brunette hair color?
-By studying what oil spills did to seaweed.
Why do brunettes have to pay an extra $2,000 for a breast job?
-Because the plastic surgeon has to start from scratch.
How do you describe a brunette whose phone rings on Saturday night?
-Startled.
ID: 7696
Blond
Can you tell if this lady is blonde?
After placing an order in the drive-thru, the lady came on the speaker and asked: "Is that for here, or to go?"
ID: 1168
Blond
Q: Why did the blonde get pulled over by the police?
A: Her headlights weren't working, so she was flashing people
ID: 10902
Blond
A flying saucer landed at a gas station on a lonely country road. The two space aliens inside seemed completely unconcerned about detection; in fact, the letters "UFO" were emblazoned in big, bold letters on one side of their shiny craft. As the station owner stood and gawked in silence, paralyzed with
shock, his young, blonde attendant nonchalantly filled up the tank and then waved to the two aliens as they took off. "Do you realize what just happened?" the station owner finally
uttered. "Yeah," said the blonde attendant. "So?"
"Didn't you see the space aliens in that vehicle?!"
"Yeah," repeated the blonde. "So?" "Didn't you see the letters 'UFO' on the side of that vehicle?!" "Yeah," repeated the blonde attendant. "So?" "Don't you know what 'UFO' means?!" The blonde attendant rolled her eyes. "Good grief, boss! I've been working here for five years. Of course I know what 'UFO' means - it means 'Unleaded Fuel Only'.
ID: 4040
Blond
Why does a blonde keep lowering her head in the supermarket?
She is looking for low prices.
ID: 1139
Blond
A couple is having a nice dinner at a local restaurant, having a good time telling blonde jokes. Suddenly a blonde approached them and slapped her hand down on the table. She angrily tells them that she can take a blonde joke as well as the next person, but it isn't nice to keep bashing them in public.
The couple apologize and changes the topic.
A few minutes later the woman needs to go to the restroom, so she goes off, and she is followed by the blonde.
After 10 minutes the blonde comes out frusturated, and storms out the front door. The woman calmly comes out and sits down at her table.
The man asks what happened in there.
The woman replies, "Well, as I was washing my hands, the blonde came in and pulled a razor on me!"
The man replies, "Oh my god, what happened?"
The woman bursts out laughing, "Well, nothing, luckily she didn't find a place to plug it in!"
+10,000 Jokes