ID: 17377
Animal
If a fly can fly, can an elephant elephant?
ID: 986
Animal
One day on a farm a farmer gets a new rooster and puts it in the hen house. The new rooster is talking to the old rooster and the old rooster says, "Just let me have 2 chickens and I'll leave you alone." The young rooster says, "No old man these are my chickens."
So the old rooster says, "Why don't we have a race around the chicken coop to see who deserves the chickens?" The young rooster figuring he is faster agrees, and even desides to give the old rooster a 15 second head start.
So when the race begins the old rooster takes off and 15 seconds later the young rooster begins running. By the time the roosters round the first bend the young rooster has almost caught the old rooster. Then as the go by the house "BANG" the farmer fires his shoot gun and says, "Damn, third gay rooster this month."
ID: 5044
Animal
What does a cow do for entertainment?
Listen to moo-sic.
ID: 843
Animal
Two robins were sitting in a tree.
"I'm really hungry," said the first one. "Let's fly down and find some lunch."
They flew down to the ground and found a nice plot of newly plowed ground that was full of worms. They ate and ate and ate till they could eat no more.
"I'm so full, I don't think I can fly back up into the tree," said the first one.
"Let's just lay back here and bask in the warm sun," said the second.
"OK," said the first.
So they plopped down, basking in the sun. No sooner than they had fallen asleep, when a big fat tomcat came by and gobbled them up.
As the cat sat washing his face after his meal,
he thought...
"I JUST LOVE BASKIN ROBINS!"
ID: 679
Animal
A mother and her young son returned from the grocery store and began putting away the groceries. The boy opened the box of animal crackers and spread them all over the table.
"What are you doin?" his mother asked; "you can't eat them if the seal is broken."
The boy explained, "I'm looking for the seal."
ID: 7013
Animal
A man was walking in a rich neighborhood when he saw a lost dog ad. Part of the bottom line of the ad was torn by the weather, so all the man could see of the ad was
LOST DOG
IF FOUND CALL 555-5555
REWARD:
ALL OF MY FAMILY'S (blank blank blank)
Being as this was a rich neighborhood, the man assumed that the blank in the ad represented money. He was very excited at the thought of owning all of a rich family's money, so he very desperately searched for the dog.
After one week of desperate searching, the man found the missing dog and immidiately returned it to the family. A woman came to the door and excitedly said, "Thank goodness someone found our precious puppy!" and closed the door.
Quite confused, the man rang the doorbell again, where the same woman politely asked what the man wanted. "My reward," the man replied. She said, "Oh, yes. Sir, my family sends all of its thanks to you. That is all what it said on the ads as reward, so thank you and goodbye!"
ID: 7028
Animal
aaaaa
ID: 11535
Animal
What's gray and comes in packets?
Instant elephant.
What's gray and comes in buckets?
An elephant.
What's gray and has a trunk?
A mouse going on holiday.
How do elephants hide in cherry trees?
They paint their toe-nails red.
How do elephants get down from cherry trees?
Sit on a leaf and wait for fall.
How do elephants hide in custard?
Paint the soles of their feet yellow and hide upside down.
ID: 4926
Animal
What do you call a horse that escaped from jail?
A Zebra.
+10,000 Jokes