ID: 4438
Animal
Three ants went to the beach to swim.
Two jumped directly in the water.
The other went back home and after an hour returned.
Why?
She forgot her swimming suit!!
ID: 17867
Animal
One fine day.... you're just walking by....
You look at this bird.... it shits in your eye....
You don't swear.... you don't cry....
You just thank God.... that cows don't fly....
ID: 14852
Animal
Which animal has no teeth?
A gummy bear!
ID: 16337
Animal
A salesman was traveling through the countryside, flogging insect repellent. He came to a farmhouse and tried his pitch on the farmer.
"Sir, my bug spray is so good you will never be bitten again, I guarantee it."
The farmer was dubious.
"Young man, I'll make you a proposition. I'll tie you out in my cornfield buck naked, covered with that bug spray. If there is not a single bite on you come morning, I'll buy a whole case from you, and get everyone in the county to buy a case. We will make you rich."
The salesman was delighted. They went to the field and he stripped. The farmer sprayed him thoroughly with the bug spray and tied him to a stake.
Back to the house went the farmer.
The next morning, the farmer and his family trooped out to the cornfield.
Sure enough, the salesman was there, hanging in his bonds, not a single bite on him - yet he was a total wreck! Pale, ghastly, haggard, and drawn - but not one bite on him. The farmer was perplexed.
"Son," he said, "Now, you don't have a bite on you but you look like hell! What the devil happened?"
The salesman looked up through bloodshot eyes and croaked,
"Doesn't that calf have a mother?"
ID: 16534
Animal
Can you decipher this phrase?
W O R K
SEESAWS
Overseas work!
ID: 16226
Animal
Clinton returns from a vacation in Arkansas and walks down the steps of Air Force One with two pigs under his arms. At the bottom of the steps, the honor guardsman steps forward and remarks, "Nice pigs, Mr. President."
Clinton replies, "I'll have to let you know that these are genuine Arkansas Razor Back Hogs. I got this one for Chelsea and this one for Hillary. So, now what do you think?"
The honor guardsman answers: "Nice trade, Sir."
ID: 16539
Animal
Can You Decipher This Phrase?
E E
Y
E E
D D
Cross eyed!
ID: 14363
Animal
Pigs are the fourth most intelligent animal in the world.
Pig's Tongue contains 15,000 taste buds. For comparison, the human tongue has 9,000 taste buds
Dinosaurs didn't eat grass? There was no grass in the days of the dinosaurs.
A crocodile's tongue is attached to the roof of its mouth? It cannot move. It cannot chew but its Digestive juices are so strong that it can digest a steel nail, Glass pieces, etc
Sharks are immune to disease i.e they do not suffer from any Disease.
Animals are either right- or left-handed? Polar bears are always left-handed, and so is Kermit the Frog.
Ants don't sleep.
The eyes of the chameleon can move independently & can see in two different directions at the same time.
Like fingerprints, everyone's tongue print is different.
The highest kangaroo leap recorded is 10 ft and the longest is 42 ft
Along with its length neck, the giraffe has a very long tongue -- more than a foot and a half long. A giraffe can clean its ears with its 21-inch tongue
ID: 14577
Animal
This is funny
+10,000 Jokes