ID: 16759
Animal
9 = tails of a fox.
ID: 5293
Animal
Earth Worm: Oh, I wish that darn evil Mister Barney hadn't chopped my brother into two sections!
Other Earth Worm: Why?
Earth Worm: Because, now I have two half brothers!
ID: 4891
Animal
How do turtles talk to each other?
Shellphones!
ID: 3183
Animal
A young boy comes down to breakfast one morning. His mother asks, "Have you done your chores yet?"
"No," replies the boy, "but could I have breakfast first?"
"You know the rules, go outside and clean the chicken coop, milk the cow and feed the pigs."
The boy goes down to the chicken coop and lazily cleans it. When he is finished he kicks a chicken. Next, he walks to the barn and takes out the old milking cow. After milking her thoroughly, he kicks her. Then the boy gets the food and feeds the pigs. Once he is done he kicks a pig.
Finally, the boy runs back to his house, very hungry. His mother gives him a plate with nothing on it but an apple. Disappointed, the boy says, "Where's my eggs, my milk and my sausage?"
"Well," says his mother, "I saw you kick a chicken, so now you don't get eggs. I saw you kick the cow, so now you don't get milk. I saw you kick the pig, so now you don't get any sausage."
Just then, the boy's father walks in and kicks the cat. The boy says to his mother, "Should I tell him now, or do you want to?"
ID: 8065
Animal
Q: Why did the Iraqi chicken cross the road?
A: To take over the other side.
ID: 2020
Animal
Where does Batman's goldfish live ?
In the BAT-TUB!! ahahaha...
ID: 5439
Animal
A lonely female crab was walking down the beach one evening when she noticed a male crab coming toward her—but he was walking straight and not sideways!
Impressed by his talent, she decided to marry him immediately.
The next morning she noticed him walking sideways like any ordinary crab! She asked, "What happened? Yesterday you were able to walk straight!"
He answered "What?! I can't get that drunk every day!".
ID: 7837
Animal
"Do you know that your dog bit my mother-in-law yesterday?"
"Is that so? Well, I suppose you'll sue me for damages?"
"Not at all. What'll you take for the dog?"
ID: 8080
Animal
Did you know... in Louisiana it is illegal to tie an alligator to a fire hydrant and leave it unattended? Really! It's true!
+10,000 Jokes