ID: 17371
Animal
Why did the chicken cross the road?
TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE! DUH! Aw c'mon, how many times are you gonna fall for this?
ID: 1
Animal
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground Beef!
ID: 2
Animal
What do you call a cow jumping over a barbed wire fence?
Utter destruction.
ID: 3932
Animal
What is black and white and red all over?
An embarrassed zebra
ID: 15769
Animal
My friend Doug pointed up at a bird circling overhead and said, "Look, it's an eagle!"
"That doesn't look like an eagle," I said.
"Well of course not," he shot back amazingly quickly. "It's travelling incognito. Haven't you ever heard that "Eagles are Masters of De Skys?"
ID: 2804
Animal
A man selling hats went to a jungle for a rest. A monkey came and stole a hat. The man couldn't catch the monkey. He realized the monkey followed the man's actions. He threw the hat to the ground. The monkey threw the hat to the ground. He picked up both hats and went away.
The man then had a grandson who followed the family business and sold hats. The grandson went to a jungle to rest while selling hats. A monkey came and stole a hat. The grandson thought of his grandfather's story, and threw the hat on the floor. The monkey ran and picked up the hat. It then slapped the grandson, saying, "You think you're the only one having a grandfather?"
ID: 16525
Animal
Can You Decipher This Phrase?
P
E
T
S
Step up!
ID: 2078
Animal
A highly timid little man, ventured into a biker bar in the Bronx and clearing his throat asked, "Um, err, which of you gentlemen owns the Doberman tied outside to the parking meter?"
A giant of a man, wearing biker leathers, his body hair growing out through the seams, turned slowly on his stool, looked down at the quivering little man and said, "It's my dog. Why?"
"Well," squeaked the little man, obviously very nervous, "I believe my dog just killed it, sir."
"What?" roared the big man in disbelief. "What in the hell kind of dog do you have?"
"Sir," answered the little man, "it's a little four week old female puppy."
"Bull!" roared the biker, "how could your puppy kill my Doberman?"
"It appears that your dog choked on her, sir."
ID: 15339
Animal
A tourist was being led through the swamps of Florida. "Is it true," he asked, "that an alligator won't attack you if you carry a flashlight?"
"That depends," replied the guide, "on how fast you carry the flashlight."
+10,000 Jokes