ID: 2033
Animal
What do you call a fly without wings?
A walk.
ID: 17685
Animal
Why should not a chicken cross the road?
It would be a fowl proceeding.
ID: 16529
Animal
Can You Decipher This Phrase?
pu
Back up!
ID: 2310
Animal
What do you call a pig who knows karate?
A Pork-Chop!
ID: 4906
Animal
What did the cat say to the other cat on the phone?
Can you hear me-ow?
ID: 2731
Animal
Q. What animal talks the most?
A. The yak.
ID: 6972
Animal
Two weasels are sitting on a bar stool. One starts to insult the other one. He screams, "I slept with your mother!" The bar gets quiet as everyone listens to see what the other weasel will do. The first again yells, "I SLEPT WITH YOUR MOTHER!" The other says, "Go home dad you're drunk."
ID: 5986
Animal
A man was taking a walk around town one day and he passed a sign saying 'Talking dog for sale $5'. He thought it was a scam, but he went to see what was up anyway.
When he got to the porch a dog came up to him. Deciding to be a smart aleck, he asked the dog if it could talk.
The dog said, "Yes, I can. I am the one mentioned in the sign. You can go inside and talk to my owner if you want to buy me."
The man asked, "How come you can talk?"
The dog answered, "I was a secret CIA experiment. They altered my genes and I used to be a covert agent. I led to many gang busts and stopped a lot of assassination attempts. Once they learned I told my owner about the cases, they kicked me out and now I am stuck here."
The man was in awe and went to talk to the dog's owner Bob.
He asked why the dog was so cheap since he was in the CIA and Bob said, "Was he telling YOU that too?! He tells that to everybody. The reason he is so cheap is because I can't believe a word he says. He's a compulsive liar! The most exciting thing he has ever done is lick his own butt instead of the cat's for a change!"
ID: 5424
Animal
One day the zoo-keeper noticed that the orangutan was reading two books: the Bible and Darwin's Origin of Species. Surprised, he asked the ape, "Why are you reading both those books?"
"Well," said the orangutan, "I just wanted to know if I was my brother's keeper or my keeper's brother."
+10,000 Jokes