ANIMAL

ID: 15704

Animal

Adoptosaurus

There was a quirky breed of dinosaur called an "Adoptosaurus". Adoptosauruses laid eggs and often times forgot where they laid them or whose eggs were who's. Basically, they "adopted" the eggs they found and claimed them as their own.

Adoptosauruses didn't eat meat because it wasn't apart of their dino-religion. They thought eating meat made dinosaurs fat and have wrinkly skin. Adoptosauruses ate flowers because they thought it made them smell good. They thought they were the best of all the dinosaurs.

Maybe they went extinct so fast because their babies got hungry and ate each other, or the T-rexes found them and ate them, or maybe they were just stupid dinosaurs that adopted their own eggs.

ID: 8077

Animal

Worst Time

Q: What's the worst time to be a rat or a mouse?

A: When it's raining cats and dogs!

ID: 17518

Animal

Police Station

Q: What did the Dallas chief of police say when the elephant walked into the police station?
A: Nothing! He didn't notice.

ID: 11656

Animal

Zoo

Last time my friend went to the zoo, he got in trouble for feeding the monkeys...








...to the lions.

ID: 14580

Animal

Dog Fur

Why does a dog have fur?



'Cause if he didn't he'd be a little "bare"!

ID: 10375

Animal

Elephant

Why did the elephant cross the road?



Because the chiken retired.

ID: 18050

Animal

Justin Boobie

Justin Beiber doesn't need mic to sing , no one needs mic for lip-syncing .

Q: Why did the Chicken cross the Road?
A:To get away from Justin Bieber!!!

JUSTIN: mom i think i finally hit puberty
MOM: really? how do u know?
JUSTIN: I'm bleeding from my vagina.

Stop making fun of him. Every time you make fun of him, you're making fun of someone's daughter.

Instead of saying when pigs fly say when justin beiber hits pueberty.

According to E! , Justin Bieber and Usher is in relationship and was found on late night dating. They will marry once Justin turns 18.

"Justin Bieber Finally hit the Puberty" was the biggest April Fool Joke of the Year .

13yrs old Girl got detention for misspelling "Believers" as "BELIBERS".

The Justin Bieber song "Baby" is the official theme song of Gay Association .

Obama : We are going through major crisis , all the teen girls are becoming Lesbian.
Press : How can you tell than ?
Obama : Because they fantasize sex with Justin Bieber

ID: 5424

Animal

An Orangutan's Reading List

One day the zoo-keeper noticed that the orangutan was reading two books: the Bible and Darwin's Origin of Species. Surprised, he asked the ape, "Why are you reading both those books?"

"Well," said the orangutan, "I just wanted to know if I was my brother's keeper or my keeper's brother."

ID: 15474

Animal

Blonde Boats

Four blondes are shipwrecked on an island. They meet a wizard who is very bored and gives them each one wish.

The first one is too stupid to listen to the wizard and she swims away and drowns.

The second one says, "I wish I was 10 times as smart as I am now," and she makes a wooden raft and floats away.

The third one says, "I wish I was 100 times smarter than I am now," and she builds a rowboat and rows to the mainland.

The last one says, "I wish I was a 100,000,000,000,000 times smarter than those three combined," and she turns into a man and walks acrosss the bridge.

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